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You are not LISTENING to me.

And that is a problem. It is time to start, Mary.

Or I warn you: things are about to get a lot worse.

It was different, this time. More direct. More personal. More threatening. There were two things that stood out about the latest note – she and Ryan had discussed them the night before, when Mary’s brain was still alert enough to be calm and analytical – and neither were welcome. It was the first time there was a threat, and it was clearly aimed at her and Ryan and their marriage.

Is there anything? she had said. Anything you aren’t telling me about this?

About why I married you? He shrugged. No, there isn’t. And what could it be? I married you for money? I mean, you do OK, but it’s not like you’re the heir to some massive fortune. Or maybe it’s because I have a thing for slightly older women? I mean, I guess I kind of do. But then you already knew that.

So what’s this about, then?

He puffed out his cheeks. Someone trying to drive a wedge between us.

Why?

I’d assume because they’re interested in you, he said. Which is why I think it’s Carl.

Could be someone interested in you, she replied. They make it look like it’s someone targeting me but the end result is the same: we break up and the field is clear for them.

He smiled. Maybe. But there is no one.

Sandra?

If it was her – which it isn’t – she wouldn’t have put her own name in the picture. But with Carl – well, he’s recently arrived. He’s divorced. And he was your first real boyfriend. More to the point, you were his first real girlfriend.

She had shaken her head. She knew Carl; he wasn’t that kind of guy. I don’t see it. That was decades ago.

Just think about it for a moment, Ryan said. You and he had sex, right? Maybe for you it was not that big of a deal—

It was at the time.

At the time, yes. But now? You moved on. But it’s possible he didn’t. Very possible. At that age it’s incredibly powerful. Having sex with someone is like gaining access to a whole world. It’s like a drug. And then to lose that? It’s like an addict losing their supply. They never really get over it. Once a junkie, always a junkie.

That had stuck with her, in two ways.

One, that Sally and Otis needed to be careful who they had sex with.

And two, that it might be true. And for all kinds of people. Who knew how many people were out there, happily married, but fantasizing about their first love, hooked still on the first drug they had tasted? Not her, but if Ryan was right, there were plenty of them.

There was a creak from a floorboard above her, and then the tread of slow steps on the stairs. Ryan walked into the kitchen.

‘Couldn’t sleep?’ he said. ‘Me neither.’

He put his arms around her.

‘You OK?’

She shook her head.

‘I don’t understand this,’ she said. ‘I don’t understand why anyone would do this. If it is Carl then he must know that when I find out any chance – not that there is any – of anything happening between us would be gone. So why do it?’

‘You think it’s him?’

‘Not really. But I don’t know who else it could be.’

‘Maybe I should talk to him,’ Ryan said.