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“Oh, I can be,” he smiled, full, and it did something to my stupid heart. “I think I can be.”

I looked at him, wondering if I did like him more than I was supposed to. That was a problem, but most problems had solutions. I just had to find one.

Shaking my head, I showed him the report.

“The results came. Layne brought them.” I told him about the mercury sulfate poisoning. “But it’s highly regulated and illegal. He must have found someone to supply it for him. Must have blackmailed someone to get what he wanted. If we find the source, we might find him.”

“Again, I’m sure there won’t be any leads. Sometimes it feels like we’re chasing our fucking tails.”

“I know. He’s so fucking good at this.”

This monster in the woods, he didn’t desire the spotlight, like most of us. His humility kept him safe, even when his thirst for power pushed him to kill.

“Ash?”

“Yes.”

“When this is all over when you finally get your revenge, where will you go?” I didn’t know whether I was his therapist now or the woman he was fucking.

“I don’t know.” He leaned back, crossing his arms.

“What do you really want to do?” I asked, looking into his eyes.

“Find a home,” he said, his voice rough yet achingly sincere.

Home.

Everything in me begged to pull him to me and protect him, to tell him he’d always be safe with me, but I was too broken for any of that.

My need for him was consuming, but it couldn’t be my truth. Sometimes, the lies were better and more beautiful than the truth anyway.

“You will.” Somewhere far away from this brokenness, somewhere wholesome and beautiful. In a place where he wouldn’t be haunted by the memories of a girl he couldn’t save.

“You? What will you do?”

“I’ll go back home,” I said, and I saw something in his eyes—something I couldn’t name.

He nodded as I opened the door, and we walked toward the main hall in silence.

Millie was staring into space when I walked. Michael looked cheerful as he talked with his dead wife.

“Good day, Doctor Sharma,” Jimmy greeted me when I sat down, momentarily pausing his song about a fire that ate away the world.

“Good morning.”

For fifteen minutes, we just talked about breakfast and other normal, mundane things.

“We are going to tell stories today, something from your past.”

They nervously looked up.

Millie closed her eyes, and Sarah snuggled with her teddy bear.

“Past… past is… no,” Sarah’s hands shook. She was a victim of domestic abuse and after years of bearing the pain, she tried to walk away, and her husband beat her until she lost consciousness. She would have died if her neighbor hadn’t called the cops.

Men who asked why she didn’t walk away didn’t, couldn’t understand what it would take to walk away. Sometimes… women had to die to finally escape the abuse.

“I know, but talking things out loud helps.”