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Mabel giggles as she nods. “And howl at the moon like wolves.”

“He was the best daddy.” My voice cracks. I can’t make myself look at Faye. “He made the best hot dogs, just the way you liked them. And he was always there, whenever you needed him. Your safe space.”

Her eyes are spilling tears now.

She nods. “Daddy had the best hugs.”

“All that got your daddy a membership into the best and most magical club.”

“Heaven?” Her brows furrow.

I nod. “Yeah, princess. Heaven. He lived such a good life, that he got to go there. And guess what?”

“What?” She sniffles, the faintest of pouts remaining on her face.

“He’s waiting for you there. But the only way you can get there is by living a long and full life, the best that you can live it, okay?”

“And then I’ll get to go to Heaven, too?”

“Yeah, Mabel.” Fuck, I think I’m going to cry. “Then you’ll get to go to Heaven, too.”

She’s silent for a long minute, her brilliantly beautiful mind working to understand all I’ve said. She whispers, “Daddy’s not coming back, is he?”

“No, princess. Once we go to the club of Heaven, we stay there. We wait for the ones we love to live out their best life, and then we give them a membership, too.”

She wipes away a tear before she throws her arms around my shoulders. “I’m going to give the best hugs and live the best life. Then I’m going to go to Heaven, too!”

I squeeze her a little tighter. I think in this moment, I’m trying to keep the wreckage of my bludgeoned heart from spilling into the rest of me. Holding my brother’s daughter tightly is the glue I need to keep those pieces contained, if only a little.

26

GUTTED

JUNE 2023 – PRESENT DAY

Iring the doorbell of my childhood home and wait for the only woman I’ve ever loved to answer the door. After pulling Mabel from my arms and carrying her daughter to her SUV, I packed up their chairs and wagon and helped Doug load it all into the trunk of his car.

Faye was already long gone. I swear, she took my heart with her when she went. Every single piece of it.

Doug told me they’d be taking Mabel for the night. Told me to give her an hour and come over.

So, I’m here. With steak.

I feel like an idiot.

I don’t know what I’m doing here. What I’m supposed to say after all that.

She’s not ready for me. For us. For all the complication I bring to her already over-complicated life.

I should leave.

She opens the door. Every muscle in my body contracts at the sight of her. Even in her grief, she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my life.

“Holt.” My name cracks on a hitched sob.

I don’t think. I just move.

I step into her, sliding my arm around her waist and pulling her chest tight to mine. The door slams closed behind us as I crush her against me, doing my best to keep all the pieces of her contained now. I fail. I know it when I feel all the pieces of us collide in a collision of fragments, we’ll never pluck free again. My pieces are splintered into the deep of her just as her shards cut into the quick of me.