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But everything about this is unfair…

Mom can’t stop crying. Dad looks like I imagine I’d look if I were in his shoes, and Owen was breaking my heart and shattering my view of what the future holds.

“Are you sure?” Dad grunts around the tears he hasn’t let fall.

“I am.”

“You got a second opinion?” His chin quivers and he sets his teeth. “These doctors are always making mistakes.”

That’s his grief talking, his fear…

“There’s no mistake here, Pop.”

A sharp, shaky curse blurts from the depths of him as he covers his mouth with a shaky hand. There’s water trembling in his eyes, and his chin quivers again.

Mom lets out a sharp sob.

My heart breaks. I don’t know why I thought this would be easier.

“I’m sorry,” I choke out.

“Don’t you dare—” Mom sucks in sharply. “Apologize.”

There’s water in my eyes too now.

“Have you told Faye?” Dad asks. “The kids?”

I shake my head, struggling to free the words that have lodged in the back of my throat.

I’m just struggling.

“Oh, Tatum…” Mom cries.

“I—can’t. I want—I need them to—I’m just not ready.”

“You take your time,” Dad tells me, though we both know I don’t have time to take.

“I need you both to be there for them all when—” Fuck, this is the hardest conversation I’ve ever had to have in my whole life. Every word hurts. Every breath burns.

Mom covers her ears, shaking her head as tears rush from her eyes. “Of course, we’ll be there. We’ll always be there.”

There was once a time when I thought always was a given. When I thought I had forever to love them. When I was certain I’d grow old with Faye.

It’s alarming how quickly the promise of always breaks.

I slide a small stack of letters across the table.

Mom cries harder.

The remaining color drains from Dad’s face.

“Don’t open them until—” I break off, but I don’t have to speak the words for them to understand.

Mom catches her sobs behind hands that tremble. Dad nods soberly as he pulls the stack from the table, holding them between unsteady hands.

I stand. “I love you both. Thank you for being my parents. Thank you for everything.”

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