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“Oh.” The moon shimmered, and the waves crashed quietly as I watched them and sensed Dalton looking at my profile.
It felt like a very long time before I spoke again. Dalton chose that moment to speak as well.
“How come your boyfriend’s not out here with you?” I asked, finally looking at him. He ignored the question.
“He broke up with you on Christmas?” Dalton was outraged.
His eyes went wide in surprise before narrowing, angry on my behalf. I felt this surge run through me, seeing his reaction. Since arriving in Breakwater, I’d finally found a few people who looked out for me, but the visceral feeling that traveled the length of my body, knowing Dalton was upset on my behalf, was so much different than what I felt knowing that Anita or Martin or Brett had my back.
We talked over each other again to respond.
“Boyfriend?” he asked.
“I broke up with him,” I said, quietly adding, “a week ago. I … haven’t told anyone. Anita and your mom might think I’m with him tonight.”
And then, almost in unison, we both said, “Wait.”
He paused for me to say, “You’re not dating Austin?” and shook his head no. Then I explained about Amir: “Sometimes you just know when something’s not right, you know?”
Our eyes locked for a beat, the ocean whispering to us, calling me, reminding me that I shouldn’t be staring into Dalton’s eyes. I allowed it to draw me back, watching the moonlight dance on the waves, like I planned to sketch the image later.
I could sense him studying my profile again, but he turned back to the beach before he spoke.
“That’s exactly right. Austin and I, we were never really more than friends. Best friends. Whatever else we were or thought we might be … that was just a phase, or Austin being Austin, or something like that.”
I didn’t ask what he meant by that “Austin being Austin.” Did it mean that Dalton’s feelings were more serious than Austin’s, and Austin had just gone along with it? It was my turn to be protective of him if he had been hurt by the whole thing.
Instead of asking him, I replied, “Better off as friends. Like Amir and me. He’s a nice guy, a great guy, really. He’s just … not for me. We met at the Sky Room.”
“The gay club near Princeton?”
“Yeah.” I snuck a glance and could see Dalton’s smile.
“What?”
“Didn’t take you for a clubber.”
“Yeah, no, I’m definitely not. But …”
“But?”
“But it felt like I should get out, you know. Meet people. I can’t be your brother’s third wheel forever, and Anita is always teasing me. I’m a member of the Chamber of Commerce, for goodness’ sake. She’s forever reminding me that I’m only twenty-six. And then you …” Shit.
“Me?”
Shit. I’d just blurted all of that out. I had shared all of that with Dalton Garner, of all people. Much as I hated lying and had proved that evening how bad I was at it, I couldn’t tell Dalton the truth. Had I not been about to blurt it out loud, I don’t think I would have understood it myself.
Had I started going out in an effort to forget one forbidden kiss with my best friend’s brother? Because I thought he was happy with Austin, and that meant I needed to move on?
“I mean. I guess. You and Austin were together, or I thought you were, and I spend so much time with Brett and Mal, and they’re sickeningly happy,” I bumbled. “And Anita and Martin are forever up my ass about finding someone. I don’t think a guy walks into the Three B’s without Martin asking if they’re gay and single. Like poor Preston.” I laughed. “When he went in looking for a job.”
“Preston?”
“Oh, you haven’t met Pres yet? He’s a teacher, but he works part-time for Austin’s dad at the restaurant. Good guy …”
“Oh. Um, no, I haven’t met him yet.”
There was that awkward silence again.
