Page 47

She could feel her bosom being pushed upward by her stays, exacerbated by her rapid breathing.

The duke’s gaze remained on her face, though, despite the deep cleavage created by her gown and her slightly twisted sitting position. He put his hand down between them, which meant that he was nearly touching her leg, and Mei’s insides clenched. She lifted her chin in the air, doing her best to let the professional, calm mask that she practiced fall over her face.

“If your feelings toward the young ladies remain the same, then I am uncertain what we have to talk about.” Mei tried to make her statement a rebuke. After all, she had already told him that she had no wish to be his mistress. If he was here to speak of desiring her…

Blast.

She wanted him to.

If he had somehow lost his desire for her in the past day, she would be wildly disappointed.

Especially because her feelings toward him, her attraction to him, had not changed in the slightest.

“I want to be clear that I do not wish to marry any of them, and I will not be pursuing them during the rest of the house party.” His blunt statement made her heart beat faster, as did his steady gaze on hers.

It certainly felt as though he was still looking at her with desire.

But he was a duke.

He could not marry her. The best he could offer her was carte blanche. Though not all women who had a lover became their mistress.

Stop, Mei. That way lies madness.

A madness she was afraid she was already afflicted with. She had to stop her mind from taking that track, or she was wont to do something rash.

“I shall come up with a new list of young ladies for you to meet then. When we all return to London.” Though she had rather thought he was in a hurry to marry.

“And you believe that a new list will have a young lady that I feel the kind of connection I’m looking for?” He raised an eyebrow. “More than what I feel for you?”

Heat bloomed across Mei’s face and in her core. He’d actually said the words. Out loud.

He wants me.

I want him.

Which makes no sense.

“That is the allure of the unknown,” she said calmly, though she felt anything but. Her stomach was doing somersaults as her leg tingled near where he’d set his hand. “The unattainable.”

“Is it?”

“Yes.” Mei nodded firmly as she finally realized what was happening. She was very much in mind of her first kiss. A boy named Johnny Bowers. She’d felt all sorts of tingling and butterflies with him, too, and then when they’d kissed, it had been wet and rather distasteful. The butterflies had vanished once curiosity was quenched. The second young man she’d kissed had not been much better.

She’d spoken with enough ladies to know about the marital act. How a lady’s body reacted. What was possible. And also that there was a large possibility of disappointment, depending on the man.

The Duke of Bolton was much like Johnny Bowers. A mystery.

“You believe the other young ladies are too known and attainable?” he asked, appearing amused at her observation, which pricked at her emotions.

“I believe that I am the only young lady here keeping her head around you.”

“Ah? And what of Lady Juliette?” he asked, waving his hand at the bushes to indicate wherever she was in the garden with Lord Hayworth. “If I were truly tempted by the unknown and unattainable, then would she not have piqued my interest?”

“Perhaps you are averse to competition.”

He snorted. “Then why do Mr. Fenley’s attentions to you not deter me?”

“Mr. Fenley’s attentions?” Mei was aghast. Yes, she’d had some thoughts that Mr. Fenley was perhaps interested in her, but to hear the duke actually say it… How closely had he been paying attention to her to have noticed that?