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“I know. You have Theo, and she does so much…” I began, but he interrupted me.

“Theo is my saving grace, but it’s more than just her,” Oliver explained. “Miley leaving River with you was the best thing she could have done, but it also leaves you with half the support system. I have Theo and her family. I have you; I have our parents. I have more people than I could count who would drop anything for me and my kids. River, and by extension you, only have half of that.”

I was dumbstruck, because I had never thought about that. I always knew that I didn’t have a partner to rely on, but I had never thought about the rest of the family River didn’t have in his life.

“So no, it’s not easy, but we are in very different circumstances,” Oliver continued. “I know this won’t change your mind, but you are the only person who thinks you’re not enough. Every day I am so impressed by you—by what you’ve done for your son, all on your own. The way people gravitate toward you? It’s infectious. Lex, I’m jealous of you in so many ways.”

“You’re jealous of me?”

He nodded. “I get it; I do. You see all your faults first and your strengths second. I do the same. I can promise you, you are good enough for River. You are exceptional for him.”

I made a noncommittal sound and trained my gaze out onto his yard. I didn’t know what to say, but I couldn’t fathom Oliver ever being jealous of me.

“Lex, why do you think this is your fault?” Oliver asked quietly. “It’s obvious Goldie being gone is heightening everything in you right now, so tell me why.”

“I…” I sighed. “I really like her, Oliver. I can’t explain it, but she… she makes me feel something new… I guess. I don’t know; it doesn’t make any sense. I just kept screwing things up between us to the point where she was actively avoiding me. You say I make people gravitate toward me? The one person I actually want to do that with only finds me annoying. Ironic, isn’t it?”

Oliver sighed. “I get it. Bad timing on your side, but I get it. I need you to understand: this is not your fault. Goldie made the decisions she did, as did you, but neither of you is responsible. The person who took her is. You can’t let this thinking distract you from finding her.”

“How? How do we find her?” I asked quietly.

Oliver shrugged. “I don’t know, but we don’t give up. Because if roles were reversed, she wouldn’t.”

Lexington

To think I didn’t know this town existed just a few months ago, and now I could navigate the streets without a map. The residents had stopped giving me strange looks, used to seeing my SUV amble down the streets. They knew why I was here, and I did my best to avoid their pitying glances. They all believed Goldie was gone, lost to the actions of the Watcher. Just another victim on their ever-growing list. I wouldn’t be shocked if they were grateful it was her, not someone they knew. Not someone they deemed important.

For twenty years, these people had been terrorized by a ghost, and I wondered if they had given up on ever finding him. But the Watcher messed up this time. When he took Goldie, he made himself a target for a very pissed-off group who would move heaven and earth to find her and bring her justice.

“Keep fighting,” I mumbled to Goldie, as I always did. She couldn’t hear me; she would never know the countless pleas I sent her way, but I hoped in some miraculous way she felt my fervency to find her—my unheard words lending her strength to survive whatever hell she was in.

She was alive. I couldn’t explain why I knew that. I just did. One of those gut feelings she would tell me to trust. I wondered what she would think of all my gut feelings having one common denominator: her. I knew in the very marrow of my bones she was still alive out there, because the moment her heart stopped beating, I knew I would feel it.

Putting my car in park, I let out a breath. I had been here in this town a lot, looking into Goldie’s car that was still being held as evidence, talking with Ransom at the station, or even just wandering down the streets. I was tempting fate each time I took a step along these sidewalks, a part of me hoping the Watcher would take me next. That he would take me and bring me to her.

I never brought River with me. Not anymore. He needed to stay as far away from this place as he could. Today, he was with my parents, oblivious to the storm brewing in the marrow of his father’s bones.

Jumping out of the car, my feet hit the wet cement, sending drops flying around me. I had no official reason to be here today. No meeting with Ransom, no information to share with the police. I had no official reason, but I did have a hunch. I could feel the weight of Goldie’s notebook in my back pocket, the worn, brick-red leather resting against the denim of my jeans. I had read the book cover to cover, but it was the end I was still trying to make sense of:

Old Man Baker

Librarian Lavelle

Brooks Graves

Tell Marigold to run, and to run far. Tell her to go where the witches were burned.

Three names, and what must have been a clue. But from whom and about what, I still wasn’t sure. I hoped I could find some answers today.

The mechanic's shop I stood in front of was awash in dark colors, matching the general disposition of the town. I wandered through the front door, a bell clanging overhead. An empty receptionist desk stood in front of me, but I could see the mechanic bay to my right. I waited stoically as a man wheeled out from under a car. He was dressed in a white tank top and a jumpsuit that was tied off at his waist. His arms were littered with tattoos that trailed up his neck to meet his bleached head of hair.

He grabbed a rag as he walked, wiping off his greasy hands as he entered the front room. “What can I do for you?”

“Brooks Graves, I presume?”

He nodded. “Something wrong with your car?” He craned his neck to look behind me. “Newer model, looks like your tires are good. Something with the system? Those new cars have the fancy chips to keep ‘em running.”

“I’m here about Goldie.”