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When I tried to take it, he didn’t let go. “You’d be safer back in the mountains where I found you.”

“What would I do there? It is not like I could pick up my apprenticeship where I left off or join next season’s tirae bidding.”

He let me tug the plum from his fingers. I took another bite, and he wiped a bit of juice from the corner of my mouth. Heat rushed to my temples.

“You could,” he said. “You haven’t lain with a man. You’re as eligible for bidding as you were when you left.”

“You would send me back to endure all that again?”

An expression of pain crossed his face. “I’m trying to put what I want aside so I can figure out what is best for you.”

I tossed the plum pit on the ground and gave it a little kick. “How could that be what is best for me? Besides, no one would believe that you haven’t lain with me.”

“I’m sure Marta assumes I had you in the carriage on the way out of town.” He batted the pit out of his path with the tip of his stick.

“Instead, you read a letter, told me to save my questions for later, and ignored me for several hours. Just what a frightened girl leaving the only place she has ever known would need.”

I meant to tease him, but there was too much truth to the words, and he flinched. “What did that girl need?” he asked.

“Just a friend, I think.”

“I hope I’ve been that, at least, in the days since.”

“You’ve been that and more.” I took his hand and squeezed his fingers.

“At that time,” he continued, “it never occurred to me that I could make that journey easier for you by talking with you, and if I had, I wouldn’t have known what to say. Even now, I’m sure there are things I could do to make your time here more pleasant. But by the gods, I don’t know what they are. Every time I think of something, I realize it’s something I want, rather than something you’d want.”

We had reached the edge of the orchard. Behind the house, to the south, the land dropped away. I could see the dark ocean stretching to the horizon, meeting the fading orange sky. My hand was warm in his rough one. What were the things he wanted? Did I want any of them?

“Seb?”

He looked down at me.

“What do you want?” I asked.

He took my face in his hands. “I want to stop thinking about all the reasons I shouldn’t touch you. I want to teach you something about pleasure. I want to taste the juice of that plum on your lips.”

I stared at him. A feeling of desire exploded inside me.

He made a soft sound, almost a growl, and then I leaned forward and kissed him, channeling all the longing inside me into a fierceness that obliterated every other thought in my mind. There was only my mouth against his: my tongue exploring, biting his lower lip. He kissed me back, over and over, his fingers buried in my hair. I had been craving this feeling, this rush of exhilaration behind my heart. It was like a barrier between us had melted away. We kissed hungrily, almost desperately.

He pulled away. “Is this what you want? If we don’t stop?”

“I don’t want to stop,” I breathed. “I want to keep going.”

“I can’t wait any longer,” he said. “I’ve been craving this since the first moment I set eyes on you.” He caressed my neck and then slid the straps of my dress down. He ran his lips along my shoulder. My breath caught. He heard the little sound and, as though it had been a request, tugged my dress down farther, and farther still, until I could feel the cool night air against my body.

I slid my arms up along his chest and shoulders until my hands met behind his neck, where his hair was shaved close to his scalp. His breathing was ragged against my ear. I moved my fingers gently along the soft skin just under the collar of his cotton toga. I turned my face up to him. “I love you.” It was true, and I couldn’t keep it to myself any longer. “I don’t know what I am to you, or if you feel the same way, but that is how I feel.”

“You know what you are to me,” he said. “You are the wild falcon of my heart. I’ve never felt such sympathy with anyone before. I never thought I was capable of loving someone. But it seems I’m capable after all.”

I paused for a moment to breathe in the spicy smell and warmth of him.

“I could never keep you caged,” he said into my hair. “If you want to pursue your quest all the way to the very gardens of the palace, I won’t stop you. But I beg you to reconsider.”

He kissed me again and then began to touch me. I shivered with the thrill of feeling his callused fingers against my skin, exploring every part of me as though he was an adventurer in a new land.

The moonlight bathed us in a pale glow. All the distance between us vanished, and I felt his desire and fear and vulnerability as though they were my own. I understood then that true intimacy is found in the moments when someone reveals themselves to you, removes whatever scraps of disguise they are clinging to, and you see them in all their flawed, bare wholeness.