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“There will not be another time.” A hollow claim, my body still flushed from the heat of his embrace.
He reaches for my chin, tilting my face to his. “Don’t lie to me. I may not do it as well as you, but I know all the tricks.”
“I think you lie every bit as well as me.” A vital reminder. Like me, Jin will say and do almost anything to get what he wants.
A wave of dizziness strikes me, the mark on my finger throbbing. As I sway unsteadily, Jin sweeps me into his arms, my hair falling loose. He carries me to the bed, laying me down, then brings me Dian’s medicine. I don’t dare take it yet—after increasing my dose the past few days, the bottle is alarmingly light. I must ration it, use it only when needed.
“Is it getting worse?” As I nod, he says urgently, “Wear your ring now. Don’t take any risks.”
“Not yet,” I say through gritted teeth. “What if they learn who I am? What if I can’t get out?”
His hand closes over mine. “Promise me, you won’t wait too long. Death is worse than discovery—there’s no return from it.”
My tongue flicks over my dry lips. “You should know me, Jin. I’ll always choose life over death.”
As my eyes close with exhaustion, he squeezes my hand. “Tomorrow, I’ll come back as soon as I can. Wait for me. And then, we’ll find a way home.”
Home. Warmth glides through my veins, delicate and soft like a brush of summer. A precious dream, nearly within my grasp… I can almost smell the flowers.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
J in and Ruilin left the palace early this morning for the hunting excursion. I wanted to join, but was informed this event was only for those invited. I glance out the window of my room. When had the skies begun to darken, slivers of violet and vermilion entwined in the folds of dusk? A breeze glides through, bearing the scent of sandalwood and that loathsome tinge of iron.
I’ve remained indoors all day, claiming illness. It wasn’t all a lie. The pain in my head is worsening like needles piercing my scalp. My hand hurts constantly, the streaks darkening to rust. A deep ache has taken root within me since regaining my ring, as though my body craves its return.
Without Dian’s medicine, I’d be a husk of myself, barely able to rise and walk. Soon, I’ll have to wear the ring; I’m almost out of time. As Jin said, discovery is preferable to death. Shan enters, leaving the door open as he carries a tray with several dishes: slices of beef, braised fish, prawns steamed in ginger, and pickled vegetables served with rice. The prince’s food is shared with me now—seemingly an honor, but a jarring reminder that someone wants me dead. I eat to keep up my strength, though my appetite has waned. The beef is tender, the prawns sweet, yet they might as well be boiled gristle.
Footsteps thud from beyond, eight soldiers entering my courtyard, crowding the small garden. They don’t leave as expected, remaining outside my door. I set my chopsticks down, the last of my appetite vanishing. “What is happening, Shan?”
“There were rumors of a plot to disrupt the coronation. Prince Zixin ordered General Xilu to tighten security throughout the palace,” he replies.
Anxiety writhes in my gut. Escape will be far harder now. “What new measures are in place?”
Shan lifts the teapot and fills my cup. “The palace is sealed; only those with a royal permit are allowed in or out until after the coronation.”
My fingers clench the cup harder. “What about those who left the palace today?”
“The order came from His Highness himself; there are no exceptions. Lady Wang was furious to be denied entry when she returned from visiting a friend this evening,” Shan recounts gleefully.
But I don’t care about Lady Wang, my fears turning inward. “Was anyone else trapped outside the palace walls?” What about Jin?
“Lady Ruilin, though Prince Zixin arranged for her to be housed elsewhere till her father arrives to collect her. I heard those of Thorn Valley left this morning and were also refused entry into the palace.”
My heart plunges. The hunting excursion must have been a plot to rid the Palace of Nine Hills of unwanted guests. Has Prince Zixin grown suspicious? “They must have been furious.”
Shan nods. “A few ministers argued that our alliance was at risk, but His Highness refused to listen. Fortunately, His Highness’s coronation is just a couple of days away, then maybe everything will be as it was.”
Two days, and yet the world can upend itself within that time. I silence my screams, wanting to crawl into bed and close my eyes, to yield to despair instead of battling constantly against it. A single thought echoes through my mind: I must get out.
I push the tray of food aside, the throbbing in my head worsening. “I still don’t feel well, Shan. I’ll sleep early tonight.” I speak loudly, for the benefit of the new guards outside who might be listening.
His face clouds. “Do you need the physician?”
“Just rest. Could you let me sleep in late tomorrow?”
He nods, whisking the tray away. “At least with the guards outside, no one will dare another attempt on your life. Once they catch the poisoner, Prince Zixin will cut their head off,” he adds a little too enthusiastically as he leaves my room, closing the door after him.
My stomach roils; I’m trapped here—alone. Pulling out Dian’s pouch, I rummage through it to find the incense coiled around the crystal. I hold its tip to the candle until the end catches fire with a hiss, smoke trailing from it. As the flame settles, I drop the incense into the brazier, praying that Dian or Jin are searching for me too, that it won’t be wasted. Then I blow out the candle and climb into bed, pulling up the covers and closing my eyes. Few things are harder than trying to sleep when everything is falling apart.
