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“So now I have to question if I didn’t go to San Diego with Colin because it really was a matter of my security clearance or because he thought I couldn’t handle it. That I’m weak.”

Jodie looked horrified. “Mac, no.”

“I don’t know that for sure anymore.”

“You’re the guy who carried my sorry ass a million miles down a mountain in horrible heat. I didn’t question you then, did I?”

“You had no choice but to trust me.”

“Mac. I have never—ever—thought you couldn’t do your job.”

“Then why did you take me off jobs I was cleared to do?”

“Because there was someone else to do them without putting you in prolonged heat.”

“You made that call.”

“Yes. No, you’re right, I did.” She looked miserable. “But, and this is the God’s honest truth, I had nothing to do with San Diego.”

“I know.”

“Do you?”

Mac looked away.

Fuck.

Because technically, he did know. Kyle gave him a perfectly logical reason and he accepted it.

But now, everything was in doubt.

“Mac.” Jodie reached out and grabbed his hand. “I am sorry. I am so, so sorry I made you doubt yourself. And I can tell you that Kyle thinks the world of you. But I don’t blame you for not believing me when I say that. I don’t blame you for not believing anything I say right now.” She wiped her eyes with her other hand.

He reached for her before he even thought about it.

Tell her it’s fine.

Mac’s chest tightened. He could pull her against him, tell her she meant well, tell her he understood, and watch the guilt leave her face. He wanted that.

It would be so easy.

Except it wasn’t fine. Not yet.

Mac rubbed his thumb over her knuckles instead. “I know you weren’t trying to hurt me.”

“That doesn’t make what I did better.”

“No.” He swallowed. “It doesn’t.”

Jodie turned her hand palm up and her fingers tightened around his. The hurt in her eyes made every instinct in him scream to fix this for her, even while some stubborn, bruised part of him wanted to hang onto the anger because it felt safer than everything underneath it.

I thought I’d left this feeling behind when I came to the States. When Kyle hired me.

He stared down at their joined hands.

“You didn’t start it.”

Jodie went still. Shit. Mac immediately wished he could pull the words back.