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Instead? I spend most of the night staring up at the ceiling in a spare bedroom, more than a little aware that Sully is in the master bedroom beside mine.

I heard him in the other room talking to someone after his cell rang, then watching television. Then, I listened to his every step as he made his way down the short hallway.

He paused outside my room for a few breath-holding moments, then moved on into his and softly closed the door. Now only a wall separates us.

Well, a wall and a mountain of baggage due to our pasts.

I roll again, punching my pillow into submission before shoving myself up. I can't sleep. And tossing and turning the last few hours has gotten me nowhere. Well, I do make one decision. I'm definitely going to take the self-defense lessons gifted me. That's a move forward, right?

I get up and make my way as quietly as I can into the living room. I drag a soft blanket over me on the couch and thumb through the movie selection.

I feel guilty for taking so much time off. It's not like this is the worst I've ever been hurt. Plus, I have bills due and a future to fund.

I will check in tomorrow—today, I correct with a glance at the clock. Get back to my normal routine, because that routine is what makes me feel safe and secure and dampens the anxiety that's plagued me since Thad showed his true self.

I won't allow what happened to mess up my life any more than it already is. I won't allow the robbery or the fear or my past to deter me from the future I see for myself and can't wait to hold in my hands. Ask. Believe. Receive. Well, here I am, doing all the things.

I finally settle on Legally Blonde and drop the remote to curl under the blanket, watching to the point of the "bend and snap" before my lashes get so heavy I rest them. I listen to the movie and drift, dozing off before coming back to listen more. Somewhere in that state of not sleeping but not quite awake, either.

"I'm never gonna be good enough for you, am I?"

The words flow through me, and I stare at Thad, watching as he smirks at my question and gives me a patronizing stare.

"I mean it," I say softly, pain piercing me. "No matter what I do, it's never enough. I'm not enough."

My words anger him, and he suddenly stalks towards me. I back away, watching, flinching and whimpering as he raises a hand to⁠—

I jerk awake before the blow lands, instantly feeling Sully's arms tighten around me.

"Hey, shhh. I've got you."

The words are a sleepy-gruff growl near my ear, and I turn my head. The house is dark with only the dim light from the television screen saver and the break of dawn peeking from around the shades illuminating the interior.

I can still smell the casserole he'd heated up for our dinner the night before. Garlic and the rich scent of tomatoes tinge the air. And as I stare at Sully, the television blackens and goes dark.

"You're okay, baby girl."

I nod and then take a breath. "I—I couldn't sleep, so I came out here. I must've dozed off."

"You did. I got up to check on you and found you out here. You looked so cozy that I joined you."

And I'd slept through his snuggling up to me on the couch, curling his big hard body around mine? I really must be exhausted.

Or I feel safe because it's Sully.

His hand is in my hair, idly stroking down the length. Strands stick to his callouses, but he continues his slow, soothing motions.

"Bad dream?"

I hesitate, but then I lower my head and allow myself to burrow into him, a part of me wishing I could stay like this forever. In the soft quiet of the morning. In the moody light of his home. In his arms, basking in the warmth of his body and strong embrace and the way it lessens my aches and pains like the best medicine.

I can't linger. I won't allow myself to play the damsel in distress. But right now? I give myself this moment.

Sully and I still have a lot to discuss. Dark, awful things that make this an illusion of peace that doesn't really exist. It's just a fraction of a moment. Which is why I ask, "Did you lie yesterday? When you said you were okay with the plan?"

And there it is.

His whole body tenses with my questions, and I have no need to hear his answer because I feel it.