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I looked toward the door again, remembering the anger in Ryan’s eyes when he told me no amount of fucking had made him stop missing me.
“How much do you know about Milwaukee?”
They exchange another glance at each other before talking. “Stop doing that and just tell me what you are obviously not telling me.
“Because we don’t know enough,” Aura admitted. “He doesn’t talk about it.”
“Cade probably knows more than we do,” Bliss said. “Briggs knows pieces because Briggs refuses to let Ryan disappear completely. But Ryan learned how to sound fine before any of us believed him.”
Aura’s fingers closed around mine. “That is why this scares us. He barely survived losing you the first time. Now he wants to spend an entire weekend acting like you belong to each other before walking away again?”
“He isn’t acting.”
“That makes it worse.”
“Maybe.” I let the fear move through me without pretending I didn’t feel it. “Maybe he walks away from this emptier than he arrived.”
“Charm,” Bliss whispered.
“Or maybe he needs to try.”
Aura studied me. “Explain that without making me schedule an emergency therapy session.”
A breathless laugh escaped me. “I’m not trying to manipulate him into staying. I’m not going to trap him with sex, use his friends against him, or turn every good moment into evidence he owes me another chance.”
“You told him you weren’t going to fight fair,” Aura reminded me.
“I’m going to flirt with him shamelessly, let him touch me wherever he wants, and make sure he sees me choosing him in front of every person I was once afraid to face.” I lifted one shoulder. “Fair is subjective.”
Bliss tried to hide a smile. “That sounded suspiciously sane until the touching portion.”
“I want him. I’m not hiding that either.”
“So, what exactly is your plan?” Aura asked.
“To let Ryan have what he thinks he needs.”
“Closure.”
“The chance to experience us without limitations and attempt to walk away afterward.” I looked from Aura to Bliss. “He believes the question is keeping him stuck. What would we have been if I hadn’t been afraid? What would we have been if I had chosen him openly? He thinks answering it will let him grieve us properly.”
“And you think it won’t,” Bliss said.
“I think he already knows the answer.”
Aura’s gaze sharpened. “Which is?”
“We were always extraordinary together. Even at our worst, the connection wasn’t what failed. I did.” The truth hurt, but it no longer required me to punish myself for saying it. “Ryan believes proving how good we could’ve been will help him accept what I cost us. I think experiencing it will force both of us to confront what we still are.”
“That sounds dangerously close to believing love fixes everything,” Aura said.
“It doesn’t. Loving him didn’t stop me from betraying him, and loving me won’t make him trust me again.” I tightened my hands around the water bottle. “I’m not expecting Ryan to wake up Sunday morning healed and ask me to move to Milwaukee. If there is any future for us, rebuilding trust will take longer than this wedding. He’ll need consistency from me after the chemistry stops making everything feel easy.”
Bliss watched my face. “And if he doesn’t give you the chance to show him?”
“Then I’ll accept it.”
“Will you?”