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“I ain’t said shit about who you should pick. You have to live with whatever you choose.”

“Even if I wanted to choose Peanut, I don’t think Anton is going to let me. Something ain’t right with that man.” I was talking shit, but him not trying to let me go turned me on in a way that let me know I was toxic as hell.

“Baby, that man been crazy. You just don’t like being on the receiving end of it.” I opened my mouth and closed it. “Now, if you done trying to make me choose your man for you, hand me that remote.” Her petty ass could’ve helped me. Instead, her ass wants to talk in riddles and proverbs that my slow ass ain’t grasping right now. I should have gone to Taffy’s. At least she would have told me something I could understand. Juanita was being petty because she and Anton somehow became friends behind my back. Standing up, I got ready to head out. Before I left, I was about to be petty right with her.

“Just in case Peanut calls and ask, I told him I got bed bugs from you.” Her head shot up fast.

“I know damn well you ain’t told nobody my house nasty. Bubbles, stop playing with me before I fuck you up.”

“I was covered in hickeys, and it was the only thing I could think of. He saw them on me. I had to lie.”

“You could have lied on somebody else. Now, I’m itching. Get yo ass out of my house. Gone bring that shit over here.” I had tears in my eyes because I was laughing so hard.

“Juanita, I didn’t have bed bugs. Anton did that shit.”

“I don’t know what the hell you got.” She started scratching her arm hard as hell. “Who pretends they got bed bugs? Somebody done bit your ass, and I don’t want that shit in here. Gone home!” Laughing, I headed toward the door.

“Bye, girl.”

“Bye your ass. This lil mutt better not have them either.” She looked at Lovii, trying to figure out if she wanted her to stay.

“Call your son if you want him to pick up your granddaughter. Happy itching.” I ran out the door and jumped in my car. I couldn’t get Anton, but I had won against somebody today.

Anton “Tax” Hodges

Key was standing outside of the title company’s office when I pulled up to grab him. He looked at his watch and then at my truck, wearing an irritated expression. I was supposed to be here at two, and I was seventeen minutes late. His ass was acting as if I left him waiting for an hour. He would live. Key opened the door and then looked at me like I was crazy. I already knew he was about to talk shit.

“Nigga, move your dog.”

“Or you can get in the back,” I offered a different solution. He stood there like he was waiting for me to laugh and the joke to be over.

“You want me to sit in the back while your dog sits in front like she’s the Queen of Sheba?”

“Hey, watch what you say about my daughter.” Key put his hands over Lovii’s ears.

“Man, fuck you and your daughter.”

“You acting like it’s something wrong with you getting in the back. You still gone make it to your destination.”

“I’m a grown ass man. I ain’t about to ride around in the backseat like I’m somebody lil brother.” Lovii yawned like she was sick of both of our shit, but I put it on him.

“She tired of hearing your ass talk. Come here, princess. Uncle Key throwing a tantrum.” I reached to grab her, but he beat me to it and scooped her out of the seat.

“Uncle Key about to throw your lil ass through this windshield,” he said before moving the car seat out of his way. He threw it in the back, climbed in, and slammed the door.

“Watch my fucking door!” Lovii let out a bark, so he started scratching her behind her ears.

“That’s right, uncle’s baby. Tell his ass.” I pulled away from the curb laughing. This nigga stayed talking shit about her, but he did the most when it came to her and didn’t even realize it. He even bought her some pajamas the other day. Talking about they was for when she had to stay at his house. Now, he was sitting here rubbing her head like he just didn’t do all that outside the place. Lovii started whining, so I reached over to rub her.

“What’s wrong, pretty girl?”

“Nigga, she ain’t thinking about you. She good!”

“I think she hungry. My dumb ass grabbed her bag but forgot to pack her food in it.”

“How you know?”

“Because I know my child.”