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‘Grace, you have to tell me, are you … did you …’ Her voice faltered. ‘Were you happy? Have you had a good life?’

For the first time, Shauna and her daughter locked eyes, and Shauna could see a touch of O’Brien looking back out at her. She knew then that she had asked the right question.

‘I’ve had the best life. My mum and dad are amazing. I always knew I was adopted, but they love me to bits and have given me the best start in life.’

Shauna felt a wave of relief wash over her. As Grace told them about her parents and her childhood, she lapped up the details. Her mother was teacher and her father ran an electronics firm. She had gone to a grammar school and had excelled at sport, especially swimming and racket sports.

Then came the moment Shauna had been dreading:

‘So … why did you have me adopted?’

For years she had done everything in her power to suppress the memory. Even now, she was breaking out in a cold sweat at the thought. But her daughter was entitled to an answer.

‘When I found out I pregnant, I was scared, but I knew I wanted to keep you.’ She turned to Demetrios. ‘This is the one thing I couldn’t tell you. It still hurts too much. You see, I went home to Ireland …’

Shauna knew she was starting to show, but she’d hid her bump under an oversized knitted cardigan and baggy T-shirt. Her mother looked at her over her glasses, her shrewd eyes never leaving her daughter.

‘Come on then, spit it out.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘You’ve come back here for a reason. We weren’t expecting you home until the summer.’

‘Would you rather I wasn’t here?’ Why did her mother always make her feel like this, like an unwanted intruder in her parents’ lives?

‘Don’t be so dramatic.’ Her mother’s face hardened. ‘Anyway, I’m not stupid. Did you think I wouldn’t notice that belly on you?’

‘Mammy, I—’

‘Be quiet, Shauna O’Brien. You are a filthy slut and I’m shocked at the gall of you, bringing yourself back here in that state.’

‘How can you say that, Mammy? I’m your daughter.’

Her mother got up from the table came to stand over Shauna.

‘No daughter of mine would get herself into that state and expect sympathy.’

‘I should have known I wouldn’t get much of that from you.’

‘What do you want then? Money? You’ve got a cheek!’

‘I don’t want any money from you.’ Shauna tried hard to keep her tears of shame and anger bottled up, it would only goad her mother to more spiteful remarks. ‘Let me talk to Daddy.’

Her mother grabbed her by the arm, gripping her tightly. ‘Don’t you even think of mentioning this to your father. It would break his heart to see you like this. Sure, the shame of it would kill him. How could you have been so thoughtless and selfish?’

‘Me, selfish? Anyway, you’re wrong about Daddy – he’d help if you would let him. It’s your own embarrassment you’re concerned with.’

Her mother’s face set in a hard line. ‘If you cared about anyone but yourself, you’d do the decent thing and have the child, then put them up for adoption. No one need ever know.’

Shauna knew her stupid dream had died that moment, her foolish idea that her mother would be angry but not for long, that she would tell her they would find a way, that they’d love their grandchild no matter what anyone else thought. Her mother continued her diatribe, the words cold and hard.

‘If you insist on keeping it, it’s life will be blighted. People will point their fingers at Shauna O’Brien’s bastard. Is that what you want? Well, I’ll have no part in it, so you can get out of this house right now and take the fruit of your sin with you.’

‘How could you be so cruel, Mammy?’

‘There’s nothing cruel about it, I’m just being realistic. If you ever want to step foot in this house again, or to see you father again, you’ll do what needs to be done …’

‘I left the house that same day, and if it hadn’t been for my father I would never have returned. When I did, later that year, after the baby—’ She corrected herself: ‘After you had been adopted, my mother never asked me what had happened to you, and I never told her. It was like it had never happened.’ She looked down at her hands sadly. ‘Now I know she denied herself and my father the chance to be grandparents. It wasn’t only my loss, it was theirs too.’