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With nothing keeping me here but my own stubborn will, I leash my hurt and anger at being dismissed like I’m nothing more than a bloodwhore. I scrape my dignity off the floor and leave, only stopping to say bye to my friends first.

Fuck this party.

The crescent moon is inching up the midnight blue sky, which is dotted with stars. I breathe in the fresh air, relief crashing through me as soon as I step outside. Inside the historic mansion, my senses were overloaded, and while I can still hear some of the music and chatter as I head down the path, it’s not all-consuming. I can’t believe people actually enjoy these things.

Exhaustion creeps over me. I scrub my hand over my face. The trees looming over the sidewalk create a canopy of darkness. The lampposts are sparse along the path, and while they’re unnecessary with enhanced eyesight, the decorative wash of amber illumination is still comforting.

I’m halfway back to the Vanguard spire when I see a tall form running toward me. My hackles instantly rise. I reach for my dagger but pause when I recognize Carver. He stops jogging when he reaches me.

“Raina. Shouldn’t you be at the party?” He glances around for my friends. While they offered to walk me home, I assured them I’d be fine. I really wanted a moment alone after the encounter with Bellamy.

“It’s not really my scene.” I look him up and down. His T-shirt and running shorts are fitted to his lean form. “Are you . . . running? For fun?”

“Something like that,” he murmurs, squinting at me. “You’re drunk.”

Maybe a little, but not enough to be stumbling around or in danger of blacking out. I have a nice, light buzz. “I’m fine.” Besides, it’ll wear off soon enough. I move around him and head down the path. “Enjoy your run.”

But instead of picking up where he left off, he joins me.

I side-eye him. “What are you doing?”

“Walking you home.”

“I don’t need a babysitter,” I snap.

He tsks. “That temper you have is something else. You should learn to control it.”

“Save the wise words for tutoring,” I mutter, staring straight ahead.

“Speaking of, I wanted to talk to you about that. You seem determined not to listen. I don’t know if it’s stubbornness or if you’re truly incompetent.”

“Goddess, you know how to flatter a woman,” I say with a sigh, picking at the skin around my nail. “Like I’ve said, many times, I don’t know how to access my magic. Maybe I don’t have any.”

We turn toward the dorms. The four spires for the four orders are dark, looming sentinels against the night sky.

“The Threshold says otherwise, Raina.”

I ball my hands into fists. Why is everyone bringing up the Threshold over and over? Obviously it was some type of glitch. “Well, then, I can’t use it, okay? Despite what you think, I am fucking trying. It’s not like I want to be weak.”

“What makes you think you’re weak?”

I glare at him. Is he serious?

He lifts an eyebrow. “Your hand-to-hand form is a little sloppy, more suited for bar fights than the Vanguard training, but you can hold your own. Once you get out of your own way with your magic, I have a feeling you’ll be stronger than most.”

“And if I can never access it?” That’s the question I’ve been dreading the answer to, though I already know what lies in my future if I fail to tap into my affinities.

Carver doesn’t answer for a long time. We walk in silence, my query hanging between us like the elephant no one wants to address. He stops at the steps of the Vanguard spire.

I pause, too, turning to look at him.

Carver gazes up at the tall spire, the jagged peak, the many dorms housed inside. “Generation after generation has passed through Diremount.” His eyes drop to meet mine, and in them I see cold, hard truth. “I’ve never heard of anyone passing the Goddess Trial without magic.”

The next morning, I wake up early to grab two mage lattes and carry them to Ever’s room. She opens the door after two knocks, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. She looks at the coffee and places her hand on her heart. “You get me.”

I hand her one and sip on my own. “How was the rest of the party?”

“It was fun! I’m sad you left, though. Is everything okay? What was that with Bellamy and Rowan?” She sits on her bed, tucking her legs underneath her, and pats the spot beside her.