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“Ainsley,” Hamilton hissed. “Wake the fuck up.”

Startled, I shot up in bed, instantly alert. “What is it? What’s going on?”

The clock on my night table read 1:00am. Hamilton had turned on my bedside lamp, and his expression was dark and furious. I’d never seen him angry before, and he’d never come into my room without knocking, much less in the middle of the night.

“Are you okay?” I asked, a knot tightening in my stomach.

“No, I am not ‘okay’,” he spat. “I am not okay because you fucking stole my credentials and used them to break into the military archive. You thought I wouldn’t find out? I get notifications every time my PID is used. And now I have to report this to Julius, and I don’t fucking want to do that because I actually liked you, Ainsley. I trusted you, and you used it against me.”

The betrayal in his voice made shame stir inside me, even though I didn’t regret what I’d done for a second. He’d never have helped me get the information I needed. But now that he knew about my betrayal, he deserved the truth. They all did.

“Please don’t tell Julius,” I said softly, fear colouring my voice. “I know you won’t believe me now, but I did it for a reason.”

“Are you working with the Order?” he asked, running his hands through his coiled hair. “Is that why you’re doing this?”

“What? Of course not,” I protested. “In case you haven’t noticed, they’ve tried to kill me, Andrew. I’d never work with them. I did it on my own, for my own reasons.”

“Which were?” When I hesitated, he growled. “Explain yourself right fucking now, or I’m reporting it to Julius. I already should have, as soon as I realized what you did. I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt by coming to you first.”

“I will,” I said quickly. “But you won’t believe what I tell you unless you see it for yourself. Take me to the military archive and I’ll show you what I found. Unlike most of you, I knew where to look.”

He balked. “It’s the middle of the night, Ainsley.”

I was already climbing out of bed. “Perfect, then we won’t be disturbed. I know it’s rich to say it now, but I need you to trust me.” He scoffed, and I added, “If you see what I’m going to show you and still think what I did was wrong, you can go to Julius anyway and turn me in. I won’t protest.”

I was bluffing on the protesting part, but he didn’t know that. It gave him pause. He stared at me for a good minute before he finally said, “Fine. Let’s be quick about it. We cannot be seen by anyone.”

“Thank you,” I said sincerely, and then I went into the closet to dress.

An hour later, we arrived back at the house. Hamilton had been quiet the entire way back. When he’d watched the video, deep underground in the archives, his face had twisted in horror, and then he’d gone stoic and silent. I worried about his mindset, but I had no doubt that he believed me now, and that the wheels in his head were spinning.

He sat on the chaise lounge in the master suite, and I shut the door behind us. We’d have to doctor the security footage later, but that could wait. I sat on the edge of the bed, watching Hamilton come to terms with everything he’d seen. When he finally broke the silence, his voice was hoarse.

“They lied to us our entire lives.”

I nodded. “I know. You’re less prepared for that reality than I was, because I’ve been in the Wasteland. I learned quickly out there that so much of the world wasn’t like what they told us.”

“All this time…they could’ve helped Maya,” he said, and his anger and despair for his niece was palpable. “They could’ve saved her, maybe.”

“Maybe,” I replied gently. We didn’t know the full implications of the drug. “But…would you want her to be saved by sacrificing another innocent life?”

He paused, pain in his expression. Finally, he said, “No. But even beyond that, I’ve been serving a man that kills his people to extend his own life. My entire life has been protecting a cause and a place that deserves to burn to the ground.” He gulped. “I didn’t like everything we did. The hard choices we had to make. But I didn’t think we were…this. I didn’t think we were evil.”

“You aren’t,” I insisted. “You didn’t know. How could you? Like you said, they lied to us. They concealed this because they knew how bad it was.”

“But they won’t face any consequences, will they?” Hamilton said, his voice hollow. “They still have an army at their command, and a population that’s too scared to fight back.”

“That may be true now, but it won’t be forever. I’ve already handed over a copy of the video to the White Rose.”

At that, his gaze sharpened. “And what will they do?”

“Make sure everyone sees it,” I said, though I truthfully wasn’t sure what they had planned. “They can’t stop it if everyone revolts. Why do you think Julius is so keen to hide this? It’s because he knows that. He knows the only power he has is what the people give him. He’s counting on you being too afraid, too deferential, or too self-interested to bother opposing him. Don’t give him that.”

To my relief, Hamilton took a steadying breath, and his expression grew determined. He remembered the military commander he was, and it transformed his stance.

“Okay,” he said, getting to his feet. “I’m going to gather up my squad and show them the evidence. You get some rest; you’ve earned it. I’ll bring news in the morning.”

I managed a few more hours of fitful sleep before Hamilton was shaking me awake again.