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‘Don’t be. You see, Alex, his hurry was not in trying to forget you.’ She smiled, squeezing Alex’s hand. ‘He can’t forget you. You share our lives each and every day, even though he hides it well and never makes me feel ignored. He is funny and affectionate and I forgive him, Alex, for privately and silently loving you because I love him so very much —’

‘Please, Bethany, don’t.’

She nodded. ‘Believe me, you are not forgotten. But the reason he married me in such a hurry is that I told him of my illness. The physician called it malignant neoplasm . . . that’s cancer to most of us who prefer a plainer English. And it’s killing me. It’s been killing me for a couple of years and I fear I may not see this year out, which is why I wanted to see you before . . . well, before it becomes too difficult to travel, shall we say.’

‘Bethany,’ Alex breathed. ‘I’m so sorry.’ Other words failed her. They would all sound meaningless.

Her companion shrugged good-naturedly. ‘I’m not going to waste my energies fighting it. The doctors have made it clear I will not win the battle so I’m taking this time to put my affairs in order.’ She giggled. ‘And my husband’s.’

It took Alex a moment or two to catch on to Bethany’s jest. She couldn’t share the amusement.

‘And with that comes my intense desire that Harry be the happiest he can possibly be after I’ve gone. I’ve no wish for him to live life as a grieving husband when his heart beats for another.’

Alex hadn’t cried over anything or anyone for fifteen months but tears welled now.

‘Don’t weep on my account, Alex. Do you know, I haven’t shared this with anyone but if I had the choice of dying now, aged thirty and married to the man I have loved since I was old enough to differentiate boy from girl, or living until I’m in my dotage either having not known him or worse, watching him with someone else, I choose to die early. I’ve enjoyed being Mrs Blakeney and given that we do not have children – couldn’t, actually – perhaps another Mrs Blakeney might give Ellenor the grandchildren she craves and Harry the love he set aside.’

‘You’re an amazing woman, Bethany. I have nothing but admiration for your attitude.’

Bethany’s smile broke wide and bright. ‘Thank you.’

‘How do you know Harry would even want me? Our last words were harsh. I accused him of something terrible and it’s been such a long time.’

‘Well, dear Alex, let me tell you, I’ve never seen Harry weep ever; not through childhood, not when his father died, not even when our beloved Edward died. He was stoic throughout. But when he read the letter that you left, tears came. He was as shocked as I but he let me read the letter, about Kitty, and I think you broke his heart when he understood.’

Alex covered her mouth to prevent the spill of emotion turning from a silent weep to a vocal one. ‘I hated that he never knew. I didn’t want him to feel betrayed. It was bad enough that he left knowing I thought badly of him.’

‘Well, it was then that I realised the full breadth of Harry’s feeling for you but even in his honesty he couldn’t convey how deeply his affection ran. You shall not have him yet, though. I need him and I love him. And I shan’t keep him from you for terribly long. But it will be up to Harry to seek you out when he is free to do so.’

Alex swallowed her tears that had been pushed to her throat. ‘You’re so brave.’

‘No, I’m just in love and feel I’ve led a blessed life to have brought me to this point to be with Harry. I don’t delude myself about the one-sided love affair I have with my husband but we’re not unhappy, you know.’

‘I’m glad.’

‘But you are unhappy – I can see it in your eyes – and so I feel vindicated in this trip north to share my secret. Harry does not know I’m here. He believes me taking the spa waters at Harrogate. What’s more, Ellenor is unaware of my illness and will remain that way.’

‘Your secrets are safe.’

‘I shall leave you now, Alex. This visit has worn me out.’

‘Can I walk you back to your accommodations?’

‘No, dear. I shall take a hackney direct to the station. There’s an evening train to London. I can be in by nine, into my husband’s arms, as Harry will meet me off the train. I like to spend every moment I can with him just now.’

‘What about your chocolate heart?’

‘That’s for you, Alex.’ She stood, embraced her and touched her cheek. ‘No more tears. Make him proud with your salons.’

And then she was gone, an elegant figure, petite enough that soon the pathway’s bushes had swallowed her up and Alex was left with only Bethany’s perfume – a waft of vanilla and woody musk flavours that left an intense smoky note around her that she recognised as Tabac Blond by the House of Caron, one of her favourites.

__________

She returned to the salon and sat with the recently foiled chocolate heart on her desk before her. Her feelings were mixed: half awed at Bethany’s nobility, the other half horrified by what Bethany had shared.

There was no point in avoiding it. She broke the heart, enjoying the snap of the chocolate beneath her fingers. It was precisely how fresh, finely made chocolate should sound. Alex retrieved the note and took a breath before she read it.

Dear Alex – or should I say Kitty?