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“What is it? I was just kidding about you ruining the mood.”

His head falls down to stare at his fidgeting hands.

I don’t know if I’ve ever seen him this serious.

“Sean, what’s wrong? Tell me.”

He pulls his head back up, his emerald eyes piercing into mine. They’re electric.

“I like you, Billie. A lot.”

I’ve been waiting for those words for weeks now. Hearing him say it out loud is so much better than in my head. It’s like finding the exact page I folded down in a book I thought I’d lost forever.

“I like you too.”

“You do?” he breathes out in relief. “Good, because I wasn’t sure. I kept doubting myself.”

“Is that why you really brought me here? To tell me that?”

“Kinda.” His cheeks turn cherry red. “It seemed like a stupid thing to text. I wanted to say it in person.”

Even though we just graduated, this still feels like high school. As soon as I get home, I’m going to call Maggie and tell her. She’s been rooting for us to get together for a month now.

I haven’t seen her since her graduation party over a year ago. She started college and I had my senior year, it was just so busy.

FaceTime is our saving grace.

“I know that I’m leaving though.” His brows curve. “I really debated whether to tell you or not.” His hands tense as he speaks.

“Yeah…I get it.” I pause. “Maybe—you know, maybe we shouldn’t do anything about this then.”

He’s leaving for Texas to start bootcamp in August. In only two months. We wouldn’t be able to finish anything we started.

His head shoots up quickly, his lips almost quivering.

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I want to. Trust me, I do. But what’s the point? End up in a long distance relationship when we’re eighteen?”

I don’t really know what he expected to come from our feelings for each other, but it wasn’t my hesitation.

“Well, I’ll come back. It’s only two years,” he says.

Only?

Two years when you’re young is like the equivalent to six years as an adult.

“I’m gonna start a business after,” he continues. “I just need this experience first. I’ll come back to Lakewood.”

“Two years is a long time, Sean, and you can’t guarantee that. We can’t do long distance at the beginning of our relationship. That’s when you build the foundation.”

At least that’s what I’ve heard.

Sean cautiously grabs my hand, watching me and making sure it’s okay. I hold onto it as it slowly warms mine. His shoulders relax.

“I get it. I understand.” His lips curve upward. “We could’ve been great though, you know.”

I actually think I can feel my heart crack.

“I know.” I scoot closer to him and place my head on his shoulder. “I know,” I repeat sadly.