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I trust him. I know he won’t do anything with them.

And even if he did, who am I? Just a gay guy who was having fun with a man I shouldn’t have been with.

I’m aware that he’s the one putting everything on the line, hooking up with me.

If it comes out, I won’t lose anything.

Cooper, though…

A shudder rips through me at the thought of our relationship, his sexual preferences, being front-page news.

Over the last few years, there have been a few hockey players who’ve come out. But they’re still few and far between. I don’t doubt that there are many out there just like Cooper who are too scared to open themselves up.

I’d love to think that things will change, but I can’t help believing it might be wishful thinking.

The general population is more accepting these days. Professional sports are different.

One day…

I shake my head. I might be asking too much.

While I might crave the day when Cooper, and all the other players in the league who are hiding a huge part of themselves, can be honest about who they are, I fear that it might be a day I never get to see.

It’s a sobering thought. But not as much as knowing that whatever Cooper and I have found will probably always be a secret and behind closed doors.

Is that what I really want for my future? To have a relationship with a guy who’s forced to hide me in the shadows?

Honestly, no. I want to live my life out in the world and let everyone see exactly who I am and proudly show off the man I’m spending my time with.

But also…I’m aware that I’m majorly overthinking this.

You’re not even officially dating, I remind myself for the millionth time in the last few days.

See, this is what being unemployed does to a man.

Only a few weeks ago, I was adamant that I didn’t want a relationship. I just wanted a hot night or two as a distraction. Now I’m sitting here thinking about walking down the street holding Cooper’s hand, loud and proud.

Thankfully, a flash of blond crossing the street catches my eye, and not thirty seconds later does my sister collapse onto the couch opposite me.

“Long day?” I ask with a smirk.

“So long.”

“Okay, I get the hint. What’s your poison?”

She thinks for a moment before rattling off a long-ass order.

“You expect me to remember that?” I ask as I try repeating it in my head in preparation for ordering.

“Calvin does,” she states proudly.

“Well, yes, that’s because you are the light of his life.”

“And I’m not yours too?” she asks with a pout.

“Nah, you’re just a pain in my ass,” I say as I get up to order.

My cell buzzes as I wait in line.