Page 196

Heaven.

If I could wake up like this every day for the rest of my life, I would die a very happy man.

Images of the kind of future I never thought I wanted are beginning to appear in my mind.

The same man by my side, day in and day out. The same man waiting for me at the end of the day, sharing our hopes and dreams and building a life together. Maybe an official commitment to each other, and a family…

While a little fear tingles within me, there’s much more in the way of excitement.

I’ve never had these kinds of images appear in my mind before, but with every day that passes recently, they’re getting clearer and clearer. And while some details shift and change, one thing always stays constant.

Cooper Nash.

It doesn’t matter where we are, what house we live in, or what state. It’s always the two of us.

My heart begins to race as I seriously think about what a future for us could look like.

The reality is that not many of the things I'm picturing will ever come true if Cooper can't tell the world who he really is.

I’ve told him numerous times now that I’m happy living in the shadows, and I’m being honest. If it means I get to have him, then I’m happy to remain his dirty little secret. But deep down, I’d be lying if I said that was truly how my ideal life looked with him.

Having him come out to the world, though, is terrifying.

It shouldn’t be, but that isn’t the reality of the world we live in right now.

Cooper just wants to play hockey. He isn’t interested in the fame that comes alongside being one of the best players in the country, and he certainly isn’t interested in the drama that will follow him coming out.

And then there are his dad and brothers.

From what I’ve heard about his father, I already don’t give a fuck what he thinks about the way Cooper lives his life. But the last thing Cooper needs is his dad weighing in with any bullshit about embarrassing the family legacy or some shit.

Fuck. I’ve never met the man, but any respect I had for him as a player has long vanished. It enrages me that almost everyone thinks he’s a standup guy and a supportive dad. If only they knew.

Maybe one day, Cooper will be strong enough to show the world the full truth—not just about himself, but the man everyone looks up to as an NHL legend.

“You really need to stop thinking,” a deep voice rumbles, scaring the shit out of me.

“H-how’d you know I’m awake?”

“I can practically hear the thoughts running around your head. Care to share?”

My mouth opens and closes as I debate whether I should voice my thoughts.

I quickly decide against it. Cooper doesn’t need to talk about his dad before he’s had his first coffee of the day.

Unfortunately, when I do find words, they’re not much better.

“Sienna knows I’m here.”

Cooper freezes beneath me.

“D-Did you tell her?” he rasps.

I shake my head. “She saw me on TV last night.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah. Did any of the guys see?” I ask.