Page 113

‘That’s the thing though,’ he continues. ‘I wasn’t. I did really like you, and spending time with you, but if you were anyone else’s girlfriend then I wouldn’t have bothered, I would have stepped away, but the more time I spent with you, the more I wanted to. It felt like you understood me in a way no one else does.’

‘You know what though, I don’t think you’re right about that last part,’ I tell him. ‘I think there’s someone else in this room who gets you – Eddy does.’

They both look at me.

‘Think about it,’ I tell them. ‘Eddy, you know what it’s like, to be under this pressure, to have so many people saying you’re the best, but you must’ve had someone you looked up to when you were his age.’

‘That’s true,’ Eddy replies.

‘I do look up to you,’ Jamie tells Eddy, taking me by surprise. ‘I mean, if anything, I want to be you.’

‘You can only be you,’ I tell him. ‘And you can both coexist. The commentators kept saying that if you could just work together, you’d be unstoppable.’

I glance towards Eddy.

He is watching Jamie closely, but there’s no anger in his face. I think he understands where Jamie has been coming from.

‘I’m sorry too,’ I say. Both men look at me. ‘I should’ve had clearer boundaries – probably with both of you. I should have put the job first. But, Jamie, you need to know that when I went to dinner with you, things between Eddy and me weren’t as straightforward as they are now; we weren’t sure what we were, but now we are.’

‘Something I said?’ Jamie jokes, finding himself again.

I laugh.

I know that it’s going to sound silly before the words leave my lips, but I’m going to say them anyway.

‘You know what, it’s never too late to just, like, start again,’ I tell them. ‘I know there’s a lot of history between the two of you, and it’s got messy, but really, if you both want to, you can just choose to forget it.’

‘Just like that?’ Jamie says.

‘Just like that,’ I reply. ‘It’s as simple as just deciding to do it, and doing it.’

Eddy smiles at me before turning to Jamie.

‘I’m game if you are, mate,’ he tells him.

‘Yeah, you know what, okay,’ Jamie says. ‘Fuck it, let’s do it. Let’s start again.’

‘You know, you’re probably the most exciting player in the league,’ Eddy tells him. ‘If you could get your temperament under control.’

‘Can you help me?’ Jamie asks him.

‘Sure,’ Eddy replies. ‘Why not? We are on the same team at the moment.’

‘You’re not retiring, are you? It’d be such a waste,’ Jamie tells him.

‘I don’t feel done,’ Eddy says. ‘But when everyone keeps asking whether I’m past it, eventually you start wondering if they can see something you can’t. I think that’s why you get under my skin, when you would talk about replacing me.’

‘I’ll never live up to you, mate, I know that,’ Jamie replies. ‘You’re still the best. Everyone knows it.’

‘He’s right,’ I chime in.

‘Well, I’m not retiring, not yet,’ Eddy tells him. ‘So you’ll have to wait to take my crown.’

‘I can wait,’ Jamie says with a laugh. ‘Thanks for saying you’ll help me. I guess I’m like you used to be. I don’t want to be known as a hothead any more.’

‘I had to learn that you can’t react every time someone gets under your skin,’ Eddy says. ‘Players will use it against you. Coaches will use it against you. Journalists definitely will. The better you get, the more people will try to make you lose control because that’s easier than stopping you on the field.’

Jamie rubs a hand over the back of his neck.