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“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?”
Sienna pulls into the long driveway of the Grove Hangar. A not-so-gentle reminder of how hard the next two weeks without him are going to be sit with me in the passenger seat.
Seeing the Havens pink-branded plane after some time away sends a shiver up my spine. A few months ago, I was apprehensive to get on, but I was just going through the motions.
This time, those feelings are replaced. Gone is the girl who was fighting to feel. The girl chasing acceptance when she hadn’t even attempted forgiveness.
Now, I feel everything.
“Aren’t I always?” I laugh dryly, but Sienna shoots me a concerned tilted smile.
“You guys will be fine,” she reassures, and I nod.
Last night, I knew there was no other place to go but to my best friends. The second Raul dropped me off on her doorstep, I cried.
I wept until the early hours of the morning. Fought with myself about maybe going back to reconcile, but I once needed space too. It isn’t my position to tell him what he needs to do to heal, but I want so badly to be beside him as he does.
“Back at work, at least I’ll have a distraction.”
“Don’t forget to take care of yourself. If you need anything, you know I’ve always got you.”
As I gather my luggage, I hug her across the middle console, squeezing extra tight, because I know I’ll need the memory to hold on to for the next two weeks.
“Love you.” She smiles, warmth radiating from her brown eyes.
“Love you more. See you soon.”
The energy is low on the plane, which is to be expected after almost a month in one place. Getting back to work didn’t feel right this morning. I wanted nothing more than to throw in the towel on this tour to be with him, but as I sit down in my seat, I settle for a text instead.
ME
About to take off… Miss you.
When he replies, my heart stumbles, but when it’s just a like to my message, my throat threatens to close.
The dancers load onto the plane one by one. Some looking refreshed, others in dire need of refreshment.
Taylor’s slim body ducks under the small alcove of the cabin door, beaming her way right toward me.
“Back to work.” She shrugs, a rejuvenated smile reaching all the way to her eyes.
“Ya,” I peep, hardly in the mood for mindless conversation.
“Everything okay?” Her brow pinches in concern as she looks at me.
Shaking myself out of my stupor, I sit a little taller in my chair.
“Yeah, just stayed up a little too late last night.”
Flashbacks of last night take over my memory.
I told him I loved him, but he still didn’t say it back to me. Not officially.
“Ooof, I know the feeling. Good thing the trip to Seattle is five hours.”
Haven is the last to get on the plane, and my stomach drops at the thought of who may appear next.
When the flight attendants get on, the deep murmur of a man just hardly vibrates through the cabin. My ears peak like antennas just to get a better listen, but they don’t notice the voice.
