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I realized then this was probably my fault.

If I hadn’t been a shit to her and pushed her away, she wouldn’t have gone looking for someone else to fill her time with.

Regret and fear had me yanking her into my arms.

She was stiff for a second and then she slowly hugged me back. “What’s this for?” she mumbled against my shoulder.

Apologizing did not come easy to me. But I forced out, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I was a dick to you. But you need to take better care of yourself.” I tightened my embrace. “Nothing can happen to you, Cameron. Okay? You mean too much. And things are different now. I’ve got work and volunteer stuff and I won’t always be there. So you have to look after yourself for me when I’m not around because I don’t know what I’d do if anything ever happened to you.”

She snuggled into me but replied, “I can look after myself, you know. Regardless of what just happened. I kicked him in the balls and was fully intending to run when you appeared. I don’t need you or Quinn to protect me.”

“Aye.” I rested my chin against her head, feeling better than I had in days. “I know. But you’re stuck with me. I’ll always protect you, Cameron. Always.”

19. Forde

Present day

It was a summer’s evening with the Highland Games right around the corner, so the Lantern was packed to the rafters as me and the lads stepped out on the makeshift stage with our instruments.

Back in school, I hadn’t been very academic, but I needed any excuse to not be in the house. I loved rock music, so when our music teacher, PC William’s aunt, Ms. Shearing, offered to tutor me in the drums, I took her up on it. And I loved it. I got into the tenor drum after school and convinced Quinn, who could read music because his gran taught him piano, to learn the snare drum.

I knew Laird was a piper and Murray was a bass drummer in the school pipe band back in the day, so I’d enlisted them, and we became the Leth Sholas Pipe Band. When Ramsay arrived on the island, Quinn discovered he’d been a piper in a military band and convinced him to join us. He and Laird only played together at bigger event spaces and alternated at smaller ones. Tonight, Ramsay was at home with his family, and Laird was our piper for the evening.

We were offered gigs all over the islands and west coast of the mainland. For a while, we were busy, especially between April and October, but as the lads settled down with their women, we took on fewer and fewer gigs.

However, we still made time for Aodhan and the Lantern.

It was kind of my version of being in a rock band, I supposed. It would surprise some folks how many women came on to us after a gig. It had been my go-to for casual sex for a while.

The four of us stepped onto the stage and the thought of sex with a “groupie” left me cold now. When I was living deep in denial, I hadn’t thought about the consequences. That being if it hurt Cameron. She never let on that it did, but there had to be a reason she was still avoiding me.

The sight of her in the crowd, sitting at a table with London and Taran, eased the tightness in my chest. She looked beautiful with her long blond hair pleated into a loose braid that rested over her left shoulder. I missed guessing what color she’d dye the strands that framed her face, though, and wished I could ask her why she’d stopped dying them.

Our eyes caught and she looked away, turning to say something to London that made her smile. Taran sat back from the table, resting her hand on her pregnant belly. It was a good thing she was tall because Quinn was a big man and by the looks of things, their baby was going to be huge.

Quinn was our unofficial front man, and he stepped up to the mic, his features etched with strain. He’d been in a foul mood for weeks because of the way Leth Sholas was treating his wee sister and he’d refused to play. It had taken Aodhan banning Roddy from the Lantern for him to agree to do a gig.

My friend looked out at the room that was a mix of tourists and locals alike. “We haven’t played in a while because I didn’t really feel like performing for some of my so-called neighbors. Some of you in here should be bloody ashamed of yourselves.”

An awkward hush fell over the room as pride made me stand straighter. I searched for Cameron. Her eyebrows were raised, her lips parted in surprise.

I stepped forward as Quinn stepped back. “I’d just like to add that there are some things being said that need to stop right fucking now because if I hear about it, you’ll have me to deal with.”

“I’ll second that.” Laird glowered ferociously at the room.

Murray, a gentle giant of a man, nodded in stone-faced agreement.

The tourists looked at one another in bewilderment, especially when one of Roddy’s old fishing crew mates got up with a scoff, waving a disgusted hand at us before he lumbered out of the bar.

“Feel free to follow that bastard out if you agree with him,” I invited between gritted teeth.

Aodhan caught my eye and shook his head in irritation, making a cutting gesture with his hand.

But no one else followed the fisherman, despite the stilted atmosphere.

“Right. That’s that, then. Let’s play.” Quinn started the opening rolling beat on his snare drum.

Laird followed with the bagpipes and then Murray and I joined in. I always thought of pipe band music as a story between the sky and the earth. The pipes were the sky, filled with the air of a billion human emotions, and the drums were the earth, the heartbeat of those emotions. They could ground and lead the pipes through joy and heartbreak.