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Exhale for four.

Calm was essential. I repeated the exercise, willing my nerves to settle. By the time we reached the group of waiting children, I was marginally more prepared to face this unexpected challenge.

“Everyone,” Clara announced to the kids. Their chatter quieted, but whispers and pointing erupted as I stepped in beside her. “Miss Patterson is running late, so we have a special guest reader. This is Ethan Gallagher, and he’s going to read to you.”

“Mr. Ethan!” A little boy, maybe five or six, in a Maplewood Bears T-shirt bounced where he sat. “I can’t wait to see you play Saturday! It’ll be so much cooler than just watching on TV.”

“And you’re a Bears fan, I see.” His enthusiasm helped ease my stress a bit.

“Yeah! I want to play for them. I’m on the Cubs now.”

“That’s where I started.”

“I know. Coach tells us stories about you and Ryland Zervudachi all the time.”

Liam coached the Cubs and the Bears, and the fact he invoked my name and Ry’s as an example of players from Maplewood who had succeeded wasn’t surprising. I found it a little embarrassing sometimes, but it was good there were players that young people could take inspiration from.

“I’m going to leave you with this bunch.” Clara smiled and mouthed thank you. “Now, you all be nice to Mr. Ethan, okay?”

“Yes, Miss Clara,” many of them chorused.

Their focus turned to me.

“Okay.” I paused, willing calmness. The bookshelves held brightly colored covers with all kinds of illustrations. “What would you like me to read?”

“I know the perfect one.” A girl with curly dark hair got up and went to the shelf. “It’s new and it’s about Pride.” She brought me a book.

I took it, looking at the smiling boy on the cover standing in front of a rainbow. The title read Finding My Rainbow, A Journey of Courage, Acceptance, and Pride.

Settling into the reading chair, I opened the book. Larger, easier-to-read text and colorful illustrations made it less daunting. Extra space between the lines meant I didn’t need to run my finger under them.

I read the words to myself a couple of times, trying not to take too much time. “In the small town of Cullman, Alabama, there lived a boy named Josh,” I began. “Josh had a secret that felt as heavy as the summer air that hung over the corn fields.”

After reading the first two pages, I turned the book so everyone could see the illustrations of Josh standing on his block and with his friends in front of his school.

A few adults, likely parents, had phones out taking pictures or filming. I tried to ignore that and focused on the young audience before me.

But I had a fear, even with this being easier to read, of messing it up. An idea struck. “Who wants to help me read the next page?”

Several hands shot up.

“Me! Me! I can read!” The curly-haired girl waved her arm enthusiastically.

“Come on up here. You picked out the book, so it’s only fair you should read some of it for us.”

I moved to the floor, sitting cross-legged so she could sit next to me.

“Hi there. What’s your name?”

“I’m Marta.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Marta. Shall we see what Josh does next?”

She nodded and I handed her the book. Marta read the next two pages, then turned the book and described the illustration. It was a nice touch, and I wondered if that was what I should’ve done or if it was her own particular flair.

Absorbed in the reading, I didn’t notice Andre’s arrival until I looked up during Marta’s explanation. He leaned against a bookshelf, arms crossed, watching us with a soft smile that made my heart flutter. Our eyes met briefly and his smile widened, sending warmth through my chest.

The moment stretched until one kid asked, “What’s on the next page?” bringing me back to the present.