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“Does anybody know?” she asked.
“Doug,” he said, when he could. “Since I was nineteen. He never said a word. He just gave me pencils every Christmas.”
She laughed, and her eyes filled.
“Of course Doug knew,” she said.
He put his hand over hers on his chest and held it there.
“Get your boots on,” he said. “I want to show you where it goes.”
* * *
The sun was already low when they parked at the pullout on the north road. Winter light, gold and slanting, coming in almost sideways across the snow, turning every spruce trunk copper on one side and blue on the other.
He didn’t let her go ahead this time. He took her gloved hand in his and walked her in the right way, the way he’d been walking since he was eight years old, through the gap in the old spruce, along the narrow way that wasn’t a path unless you knew it was a path. He showed her the notch cut into the trunk of a big spruce at eye level, grown over now, soft with bark.
“Roy cut that,” he said. “So I’d know where to turn. I was eight. Couldn’t see over the snowbanks.”
She put her glove on it.
They came out onto the granite shelf. The lake was frozen all the way across now, white and wide, and the low sun lay across it in a long gold stripe, and the shadows of the trees on the snow were blue. Deep, clean blue.
“Blue shadows,” she said, almost to herself.
“Sophie,” he said.
She looked at him, startled. “How do you know about Sophie’s shadows?”
“You told me. Tuesday night. For about fifteen minutes.”
She laughed. “I did, didn’t I.”
He led her past the granite shelf and up a short slope through the trees, the snow deeper here, up to where the ground leveled out into a clearing. Not large. Flat and quiet, ringed with old spruce, open to the south. From here you could see the whole lake laid out below, and the mountains on the far side standing up white and gold against the sky.
He stopped in the middle of it.
“Roy bought this land in 1961,” he said. “Twelve acres. Four hundred dollars. My grandmother thought he’d lost his mind.” He looked out at the lake. “He never built anything on it. Never cut a tree. He just brought me fishing.”
“It’s yours,” she said.
“It’s mine.”
She turned in a slow circle in the snow. He watched her see it. He watched her see the house, the one from the drawings, standing here in the clearing where it didn’t exist yet. He could tell she was seeing it because her eyes kept going to the same places his always did.
“The porch,” she said, pointing toward the lake.
“Porch there. Facing the water.” He moved without meaning to, the way he always moved out here when he let himself think about it, pacing out lines in the snow. “Kitchen here. East windows. In the morning you’d get the sun coming up off the ice.” He stopped. “Stone at the base. Timber above. Low roof. So it looks like it’s always been here.”
She walked into the kitchen that didn’t exist. She stood where the east windows would be and looked out at nothing, at trees and snow and the edge of the lake, and he stood there in the clearing and watched a woman stand in a house he had been drawing alone for nineteen years.
She stayed there a long moment, looking out past the trees at the lake. The whole lake, from this side. The same water she had been drawing from her porch since August and painting since Tuesday, on a canvas she turned to face the wall every night so he wouldn’t see it before it was done. He watched her look at it the way she looked at the gap in her spruce trees every morning. Like it was never once the same.
“You could see it all year from here,” she said, almost to herself. “Every season.”
Then she turned around.
“Where does the north light come in?” she said.