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I wave my hand. “No, never mind. That’s it. Voilà. Baby in the oven. Set timer to nine months.”

He taps my thigh. “No, go on. What were you gonna say?”

I deflate. “Okay. They recommend that you…” My lips twitch. I shift on the cushion. My cheeks burn. “Shit, okay. You need to get your cervix to suck up the sperm so it… you know, gets in, and the best way to do that is through… orgasm.”

“Okay, wait.” He empties his glass and sets it down again. “You masturbated… with my sperm inside of you?”

I hold my breath. “… Yes.”

“Well, that’s…” His throat clears. “A perfectly normal medical procedure.”

“Right.”

“Women do that every day.”

“We do, yeah.”

He stares forward at the far wall with wide-open eyes.

I sit still, feeling my muscles burn from being flexed and stiff. “Milo?”

“You want a drink?” he asks.

I look at the one in my hand. “I have one⁠—”

“I’m gonna get a drink.”

“You have one, too.”

He picks up his glass, along with the bottle on the table in front of us. “Refill?” he asks, his voice an octave higher than usual.

“Yes, please.”

He takes my glass and I watch his hard expression trying not to laugh as he attempts to fill the glasses. Once he’s done, he hands mine back and I nod.

“Thank you,” I say.

We both take another drink. I close my eyes as the rush of alcohol goes a little deeper into my head.

Milo sits back, and we look at each other again. Somehow, we’ve moved closer on the couch. I’m not sure how or when that happened, but I make no move to correct it.

He presses his lips together. “And you didn’t want to do it the old-fashioned way?” he asks.

“No. Well…” I shrug. “It certainly would have been nice, don’t get me wrong. But me and the old-fashioned way weren’t getting along too well for a while.”

“How long?”

“How long?” I repeat.

“How long has it been since you’ve done it the old-fashioned way?” he asks slowly, casually peeking out at me with those deep, colorful eyes.

“Uh…” I think hard as his fingertips brush my thigh. “Like a year or so…”

“That’s not too bad.”

“Before Charlotte was born.”

He winces. “Ouch.”