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He looked down at her, struggling to find words which would convey what he had endured without revealing more than he intended.
Perhaps concealment had already cost them too much. He had spent weeks persuading himself that his affection for Judith could be contained within the limits of duty and good sense. He had offered her protection when he wished to offer devotion, and he had hidden behind the obligations of his profession whenever she came dangerously close to discovering the truth.
Now he had nearly lost her. The realization stripped away the last of his caution.
“Judith, I was not merely frightened…”
She waited.
“I was terrified,” he admitted. “I have faced dangers which ought to have taught me that no man can command every circumstance, yet this morning, when I could not find you, I discovered that all my experience was of remarkably little use.” He took her hands. “I have been attempting to convince myself that what I feel for you is an unfortunate distraction from my duties. I told myself that once this affair was concluded, I would return to my work and you would resume your life at Blackthorn.”
Judith grew very still. “Is that what you intend now?”
“No.” The word emerged with a certainty which surprised even him. “I cannot imagine leaving you.”
Her fingers tightened around his. “Basil—”
“I love you, Judith.” For a moment he could hear only the faint sounds of activity elsewhere in the house. “I love your courage, although I should be grateful if you exercised it with rather more caution. I love your kindness, your intelligence, and your infuriating determination to manage every difficulty placed before you. I love the way you challenge me when I become unreasonable, and the way you care for people who can offer you nothing in return.”
Her eyes glistened.
“I have been a considerable fool for imagining that silence would make the matter less complicated.”
Judith gave a soft laugh. “You have been rather foolish.”
“I am relieved to discover that you agree.”
“Most emphatically.”
He smiled, then grew serious. “I cannot promise you a life free from uncertainty. My duties may take me away, and there will be occasions when I cannot explain everything I am doing. I can promise that I shall never willingly leave you wondering whether or not you are loved.”
Judith stepped closer. “Supposing I have no wish to be left behind?”
Baines regarded her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I have spent years managing Blackthorn because my uncle required someone to do it. I love this house, but it is not the entirety of my life. I should like to discover what lies beyond its walls, particularly if I might do so in the company of a gentleman who has finally learned to speak his mind.”
His heart gave an extraordinary leap.
“You might consider asking me a question, Major.”
He laughed. “Then I had better make certain I ask it properly.” He released her hands only long enough to lower himself upon one knee.
Judith stared at him. “Basil, you cannot possibly mean to propose here?”
“Why ever not?”
“We are standing beside a broken door, in a room which has not been properly cleaned in years, while half your regiment pursues a traitor through my uncle’s grounds.”
“I cannot imagine a more memorable setting. I have no intention of delaying my declaration a moment longer.”
“You are impossible.”
He took her hand. “Judith Finch, will you do me the very great honour of becoming my wife?”
Her smile trembled. “Yes.”
Baines scarcely dared believe he had heard her correctly. “Yes?”
