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“I… can’t.” My nails dug harder into my skin, the pain soaring through my body. “Choking… me.”
“There’s nothing choking you.” She rose to her feet and my vision blurred as I clawed harder, the burning sting of my nails ripping my flesh forcing electricity to buzz through me.
“You’re hurting yourself!” She tugged my hands away from my neck, eyes heavy with fear. “Oh my— Breathe!” She gripped my face with both hands and with my mouth gaped open I shook my head. “Yes. You can.” Her hold tightened. “Breathe, Nirah, breathe.”
Breathe, baby. Breathe. “I need you to breathe for me. Please, Nirah. Breathe. Just… breathe.”
My mother’s concerned eyes were staring back at me, filled to the brim with tears and goosebumps rippled across my skin. The pain in her voice. The tension in her body. The tremble in her hands.
“Breathe.” Rosalia yanked me out of my head and I inhaled deeply, coughing as my body slumped forward. My hand clutched my chest and she wrapped both arms around me, pulling a quiet sob out of me. “You’re okay,” she cooed, rocking back and forth and I clutched her arm against me, allowing the stream of tears to gush down my cheeks. “I’m right here.” She kissed the top of my head, holding me tighter.
“Rosalia.” I sobbed, desperately holding her.
“You’re okay, Nirah.” She sniffled, repeatedly kissing the top of my head. “You’re okay,” she whispered. I’m okay…
CHAPTER 31
Nirah
I woke up in a dark, empty bedroom the next morning with a note from Rosalia informing me that she’d have loved to stay but had work to do, and that I should let her know as soon as I was up.
She also left a glass of water, a glass of orange juice, and a painkiller. She knew me too well.
I got up and headed back to my bedroom. As soon as I stared at my reflection in my bathroom mirror, bile infiltrated my throat.
Steadily, I lifted my fingers to the claw marks on my neck. I exhaled a shaky breath, looking up at my swollen red eyes.
I hadn’t experienced a night like last night in years, and I didn’t know how to handle it. How to cope. Before, I had my mom… my dad… Nereus. Now, everything had changed.
I did what I ultimately did best and ignored it, hoping it’d go away. It worked years ago. This time shouldn’t be any different.
* * *
Sally was over the moon when Nereus, Silvia and I accompanied her to the indoor pool.
Silvia couldn’t catch a break with how energised Sally was.
Thankfully, Antonio was telling the truth. Not him, or his men hurt Silvia, and she was okay. Well, as okay as can be regarding the circumstances.
Seeing them eased the pain and torment my mind had been under, but not enough to make the sadness go away.
Nereus nudged my arm as he sat to my right, legs dangling in the water like mine. “Something happened.”
Without tearing my eyes from Sally’s smile, I gave my head a slight shake.
He sighed. “Nirah, I’m your twin brother. Need I say more?”
When I turned my head to finally look at him, he had his serious face on, which ironically, I couldn’t take seriously.
“I’m just worried about breaking the news to Sally,” I shifted my attention back to her. “She’s going to feel unwanted again.”
Nereus’s hand rested on my shoulder when Sally waved at me. “Come join us!” She called out, standing on the edge of the pool before taking a deep breath in and jumping back into the water.
She landed with a splash and quickly resurfaced with Silvia at her side, cheering and giving her a high five.
“She’ll understand, Nirah.” He gave my shoulder a squeeze and I exhaled, not entirely convinced.
In the cutest baby blue swimsuit, she doggy paddled towards me and held onto my calves to keep her afloat. “Did you see me jump?” Her bright blue eyes stared up at me and I smiled, nodding.
