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Sage closed the book harder than she meant to, heart hammering. Cal stayed perfectly still, but she could feel him paying attention. After a moment, her hands trembling slightly, she opened it again.
I left. I took the Jeep Felicity got me and drove north. I almost had another episode like the one in the bathroom… but I kept going. And somehow I ended up in Montana.
It’s been one day. One. I’m near a small town. A nice man named Cal — everyone calls him Bear because he’s as big as a house — kinda saved me. There’s also a literal grizzly bear named Brutus who likes cookies… and I guess he likes me too.
She sniffed, the words blurring a little.
You would’ve liked him. He’s like how Shadow was for us… before.
Anyway. I ate dinner with Cal tonight. He prays before meals and cooks like it’s nothing. He prays for me. For me. And then he gave me a room. For as long as I want. And I unpacked.
She stared at those two words. I unpacked. The pen pressed harder into the paper.
I don’t understand what’s happening.
This doesn’t happen. Not to us. People don’t just open their home and say “this is yours now” and mean it. There’s always a catch. There’s always a price. You know that better than anyone.
She tried for sarcasm.
Sometimes I think I accidentally wandered into one of those romance novels Felicity used to read. Gross.
She underlined gross three times, but the humor died halfway through. Her throat tightened.
Except… it’s not gross. He told me not to paint the walls black. Like he sees the real me — the one who would absolutely paint every wall in that room black — and he still wants me here. Not fixed. Not saved. Just… here.
Something hot slipped down her cheek and landed on the page, smearing the ink.
Sage stared at the blurry spot. She hadn’t even realized she was crying.
Cal was still reading. Or at least pretending to. He hadn't turned a page in a while. He wasn’t watching her. He was just… being. Like having her curled up beside him crying quietly into her diary was the most normal thing in the world.
She felt the fur throw shift slightly higher over her lap. Cal’s hand found her ankle under the blanket and simply rested there — warm, steady, anchoring. He never looked up from his book.
Her chest ached so badly it hurt.
Felicity…Mama… she told me someone would help me. I swear I heard her…I mean I did have a fever I guess… but I did. I heard her. And I almost didn't go into the diner.
But she was right. Someone was there. I think… I think I found you another mom too. Her name’s Mary Sue Ellen. She makes cookies and she hugs really well. And she feels safe. Like Cal.
More tears fell onto the page.
Sage? I think you would have been happy here. I think you would have felt safe too.
The pen trembled in her fingers.
Like I do.
I unpacked and…I think I’m going to stay.
Sage closed the journal and felt more tears fall as she tried to hide it but Cal had already moved the blanket out of the way, his arm open still looking at the book, giving her the privacy to fall apart.
She hesitated only a second before she crawled toward him and settled into his large chest and cried for a long time while his hands gently stroked her hair and the snow fell outside.
I’m going to stay.
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SAGE