Page 44

‘Oh, I’m sorry. Were you taking a nap?’

‘No.’ A dismissive wave as she crossed to the sink and filled the kettle. ‘I was having a lazy day. Reading in bed.’

All was quiet apart from the water spitting from the old tap over the sink. The kitchen was the same as it had ever been; if anything it was in an even worse state of repair. Paint hung from the ceiling in loose peels, and there were a couple of large brown stains that indicated a leaking roof. Not what you want in the wet season in the Territory.

The familiar smells of her mother’s cooking were long gone and a mouldy damp smell pervaded the air. No sweet aroma of mango chutney lingered, although there were still a few bright yellow stains on the old combustion stove and down the wall where the pots had once boiled over during her childhood. No matter how much Mum had scrubbed, the stains remained.

Susan watched as Ellie’s gaze moved around the room before she gestured for her to sit at the table. ‘I know. The house is in poor condition. My husband has promised to get it seen to.’ But Ellie sensed a lack of conviction in her voice.

Why on earth are they living in this dump? Because that’s what it was now. Neglected and rundown. Kane had said they had lived in Darwin before and suddenly a memory pierced Ellie like a sharp needle prick.

‘You’re the Susan that my mother knew in Darwin. She used to visit you at the beach . . . at Cullen Bay?’

‘Yes, that’s right. We met at the CWA national conference the year it was held in Darwin. Your mother’s mango chutney was famous. She scooped all the prizes at the show that year.’

‘I remember now.’ That school holiday they’d left Dad at the farm and had a girls’ week away; she’d forgotten all about it. Typical – the good memories disappeared and the bad ones stayed to haunt your dreams. ‘We stayed at a caravan park near the showground and when Mum went to visit you, she dropped the three of us at a big shopping centre. Em, Dru and I shopped all day.’

They’d bought make-up and magazines and had lunch at the food court and felt very grown up. She smiled; that was her first taste of a cappuccino and her sisters had laughed as she’d spat the bitter flavoured milk into a tissue after ordering and trying to look mature.

‘How is your mother?’ Ellie looked up at the woman sitting across the table and the sadness on her face surprised her. ‘I’ve written to her a few times over the years but I didn’t know if she was still living around here. She was a good friend to me when I used to come out here and visit Panos, but we lost touch when Peter . . . when your dad . . .’

Ellie’s pleasant memories evaporated like the steam that began to puff from the kettle on the old wood stove. Leaning back into the chair, she held the other woman’s intent gaze. ‘She’s doing okay. She’s moved away.’ It was all she could manage. After all, this woman offering her tea and kind words was the wife of the man who Mum blamed for Dad’s death. Of course she wasn’t going to send a chatty letter back.

Dear Susan, how are you? How’s your husband? I don’t have one anymore.

The kettle let out a piercing whistle and Susan pushed herself up slowly from the table. As she stood, her dressing gown gaped open at the front and Ellie caught a glimpse of long, stick-like legs beneath the edge of the knee-length nightie.

‘Tea?’ Susan pulled her gown together and retied the belt.

Ellie nodded. All she wanted to do was get out of here, but Susan’s loneliness was palpable and she didn’t want to seem ill-mannered. As the older woman bustled about lifting down a tea caddy and opening the fridge, Ellie’s gaze settled on the small white boxes in the middle of the kitchen table. Medication – six boxes of varying size. She tipped her head to the side, knowing it was rude, but she couldn’t help herself. ‘Susan Sordina’ was typed on each label.

She started as Susan placed two cups on the table in front of her. ‘Would you like a biscuit? I’m sorry I don’t have any home baking to offer you.’

Ellie waved her hand. ‘That’s fine. A cup of tea is plenty.’

Much more than she’d intended when she’d knocked at the door. All she wanted to do was get out of this house with its dead smells, stained walls and cloying memories. Susan gestured to the boxes on the table. ‘They make up most of my diet these days. I’ve not been well, and I haven’t had a chance to bake. Not even a CWA scone in the freezer.’ She laughed but she caught her breath and for a moment Ellie thought the woman was going to cry, but she put her hand to her mouth and coughed. ‘My husband works in Darwin, so I’m here by myself through the week. It’s lovely having Kane visit, though. He came on Saturday and Sunday but he was busy this afternoon, so it’s nice to have an unexpected visitor.’ Her breath was short and choppy.

‘I’ll call in again next time I go to Darwin.’ The words were out before Ellie could think. Of course, if Kane was visiting there was no need to offer, but she felt sad to see this woman looking so lost and lonely. Her smile was sweet and again, Ellie saw a flash of Kane in Susan’s deep hazel eyes.

Susan’s hand shook as she lifted her cup to her mouth. ‘So Ellie, Kane tells me you’re a helicopter pilot as well. What a lovely coincidence that the two of you should end up working together.’

Ellie lifted her cup and sipped the hot tea. Guilt trickled through her as Susan’s face came alight. Why guilt would hit her, she didn’t know. She didn’t have anything to hide.

‘What brings you back to the old place?’

‘I saw Kane’s Jeep here the other day when I was driving back from Darwin. He told me you lived here.’

‘So you decided to call in? That was so sweet of you. I’m so pleased there is a – a sort of – connection between us. Kane needs friends.’ Susan looked over Ellie’s head to the windows and was quiet for a moment. When she turned back she reached over and took her hand. Her grip was tight and her fingers were like ice. Ellie looked down at the thin hand gripping her fingers. Susan’s skin had a slight yellowish tinge and the veins stood out on the back of her hand.

‘We’re a fine pair. He’s not been well either.’ She gave a little laugh but there was no mirth in it. She sounded almost embarrassed that perhaps she was sharing something she shouldn’t.

‘I don’t know Kane very well. We just work together.’

Except that we just had sex last night.

‘No, you wouldn’t. He is a very private man.’ Susan bit her lip and stared at Ellie. The look on her face indicated she was about to share something. ‘Did he tell you what happened in Afghanistan?’

‘Afghanistan? No.’