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Telling my mother would’ve made it more real somehow. And if it’s a real, that means it can end. And I’m not quite ready to face that possibility. If my cheating boyfriend in LA made me so heartbroken that I had to move to a different town, then how devastated will I feel when things with Hayden end? We might’ve only been together for two months, but things with him feel more intense.
Don’t think about it.
But it’s too late. Panic rises in my chest, and I have to remind myself to take a deep breath.
I’ve been on the verge of tears for days now, but I’ve tried my best to keep it from everyone. Pressure builds behind my eyes, and I grind down hard on my molars in an attempt to keep my cool.
“I know the funeral is today, so I hope it’s not bad timing.” My mom looks worried.
“Not at all. You can come to the funeral if you’d like,” I say, walking into my small kitchen to grab water for all of us.
“Wouldn’t that be weird? Going to a stranger’s funeral?” She sounds unsure as she follows me.
“It’s more of a huge party with half of the town invited,” Hayden adds, sighing.
“It sure seems like an unusual event from the details Robin gave me,” she says, accepting a glass of water from me. “Thanks, Robs.”
“You call her Robs too?” Hayden asks.
“Yes, her father used to call her that,” my mom explains. “He’s the one who wanted to name her Robin. He was obsessed with Robin Hood as a child.”
“It’s a cute name,” Hayden says. “Cute like our Robs.”
He grins at me, and I give him the side-eye. I’m not actually bothered that he keeps calling me cute, but it’s been an ongoing joke that I give him attitude about.
“She dressed up as Robin Hood for Halloween three years in a row,” my mom says fondly.
“Mom, stop it.”
“Robs, we all dressed up as kids.” Hayden chuckles.
“Well, she was already a teen at the time––”
“Mom!”
“Oh my God.” My boyfriend looks elated. “Do you have pictures?”
“No, she doesn’t.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“One of them is her contact photo in my phone,” my traitorous mother says, her phone already in her hand as she scrolls through her pictures.
I groan.
The two of them smile as they look at whatever my mom shows him, and I’m dying on the inside. It’s not that the costume was bad; it was just way more childish than anything the other kids at my school wore. Whereas a lot of the girls already dressed up in sexy, skimpy outfits, I was in a dorky costume with a bow and arrow.
“This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. You have to send me these, Yvonne.” Hayden beams at her. “That’ll be my new contact picture for her too.”
“Stop embarrassing me, you guys.” I close my eyes and rub my temples.
“Honey, there’s nothing embarrassing about it. You were cute, and you always said you liked that costume because you thought your dad would be able to see it from heaven.”
“Aw, Robin,” my boyfriend says, looking at me softly. “We’ll both dress up as Robin Hood this Halloween.”
“Both of us?”
“Maybe just you? And I’ll be the rooster. What’s his name in the movie? I forgot, but it would make sense, since I am the guy, that I’d dress up as the cock––”
“Okay, let’s stop talking about this,” I interrupt, while my mom bursts out laughing. “Anyway,” I say, facing my mom, “do you want to get lunch? We have time before we have to leave for the funeral. Hayden and I need to be there a bit earlier to oversee all the vendors setting up and such.”
