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It was my birthday tomorrow. February twenty-first. A Pisces.

Subconsciously, my hand rose to fiddle with my little gold swallow necklace. I hadn’t told anyone about my birthday. I hadn’t felt the need to. I wasn’t really among friends and I wasn’t planning on celebrating it. Or, well, I suppose I could go and get myself a cake, or something. But turning twenty-seven just didn’t feel like a big deal. I hadn’t really made a big deal of it in years. Last year I’d gone out to dinner with some friends from Frequency, the year before… I couldn’t even remember. The past few years had been a tapestry of pushing myself so hard I barely remembered the date, or enduring the pandemic and Mum’s cancer.

The only birthday I’d really celebrated had been four years ago.

Almost without my permission I remembered the day. It hadn’t even been that special – at my insistence. Just a day spent lounging around, being fed coconut cake and… well. My cheeks heated at the memory and I crossed my legs, clearing my throat.

I remembered the little charm bracelet that I hadn’t worn in years, still in my jewellery box in Cumbria. Only two charms on it. A koi fish and an infinity symbol.

“A koi,” he’d explained, fastening the chain around my wrist. “They’re a symbol of endurance in the face of hardship. A fish is also the sign of Pisces.”

“Where we met,” I’d replied.

“Yes, and it’s also your birth sign. We met at the place of your birth sign. It was fate.”

Maybe, it was, I silently wondered, nearly four years later to the date.

Chapter 14

ENT had rented out the entire hotel in Osaka for the tour crew, so moving through the halls had an almost college-dorm-like feel to it as I wheeled my expensive luggage down the hall to the room I was sharing with Sihyeon. This experience was reinforced later in the hotel’s restaurant, where I spotted Jackson sitting at a table with a bunch of other techies, none of whom were talking to him. He motioned me over and I put my tray down to sit with him.

“Thompson, thank God,” he exhaled heavily. “I don’t speak Korean, and the usual lads I’ve been hanging out with ditched me.”

I laughed. “Why, what did you do?”

“I don’t know! I was practising Hangul! On the train this morning, I was writing the alphabet, and Minho told me to write his name, so I did.”

I waited for him to continue the story, but he didn’t.

“And?” I prompted eventually, spooning rice into my mouth.

“That’s it!” he insisted, throwing up his hands.

“Show me,” I challenged, pointing my spoon at the notebook on the table. I assumed he’d just mixed up the letters, maybe spelling out something rude.

Jackson slid his notebook to me, and I took another mouthful of rice before grabbing the little book and flipping through it, momentarily impressed by his diligent practice, if somewhat terrible handwriting. I got to the last page and nearly choked on my rice, definitely spitting a couple of grains out.

Jackson thumped me on the back while I swallowed and laughed so loud it attracted the attention of the people sitting nearest to us.

“Jackson, you fucking idiot,” I wheezed.

“What? What did I do?”

“You wrote his name in red ink!”

“So? It was the only pen I had.”

Bless him, he looked so confused that it just started me off all over again. I fanned myself with his little notebook, tears rolling down my face. It took me a couple of minutes to compose myself. I had to stop looking at him, otherwise I’d start laughing again.

“It’s kind of taboo to write a living person’s name in red ink. It’s associated with death. You basically just cursed him. No wonder your mates buggered off.”

“Fuck off.” He gaped at me, wide-eyed, and I snorted.

“No, seriously,” I said, sliding the notebook back over to him. “I’d bin that, if I were you, and the pen. Then beg for forgiveness.”

He groaned, and I laughed again.

Since we’d gotten to Osaka a few days before the first concert, a plan was formed for some of the crew to hire a coach and travel to Kyoto the next day. Later, in my room, I thought about it. On the one hand, Kyoto looked gorgeous, and I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t want to go. But on the other hand, there was a part of me that felt like it would be weird to go to Kyoto on my birthday.