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“Maybe if you had, I would’ve got my memory back,” he said, only half-joking.

“Why would you think that would work?”

“When I drank your blood, I saw flashes of my past. If I had forgotten my past because my brain wanted to hide the trauma, then maybe the trauma of drinking your blood brought them back to the surface.”

“Poisoning yourself isn’t the answer. Let’s stick to blood for now, human,” she added nervously. “Besides, after yesterday’s drama, I didn’t have a chance to tell you that I dropped off the plaque and the ring to Miranda at the antique shop. She recognized the name St. Draqial as a vampiric clan, and I’m sure it won’t be long before she has information about your family and your ship.”

Gideon got up from the table and wrapped his arms around her. “Thank you, we’re one step closer.” He stilled when he realized what he’d done, but when she relaxed in his arms, he held her a little longer.

“Exactly, if you’d waited for me to come home yesterday, you wouldn’t have had to wait until now to find out,” Aerin said, patting him on the back.

“And you wouldn’t have cracked your skull open.”

“That wasn’t your fault.”

“Imagine if you’d lost your memory; we’d be the blind leading the blind.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time,” she muttered, sprinkling some dried seaweed on top of her cereal.

“You’ve suffered from memory loss?” he pressed. “How did you get them back? Did you get them all back?”

“A witch…” she started, but he interrupted her rudely, rushing for an answer.

“This town is packed with magical folk. It makes sense that a witch could help. Is the witch who helped you still in town? Do they only deal with memories, or with past-life regression?” he asked. “Both might help me, since I was buried at sea for so long.”

“Gideon, stop!” Aerin slammed her spoon on the table. Gideon clenched his jaw, not having meant to overwhelm her.

“Magic is far too dangerous,” Aerin warned. “You don’t want to mess with memory retrieval.” He studied her dark expression.

“So you do know someone who can do it? Then you understand what it’s like to feel lost to yourself. To not know if you’re a monster,” he said.

“You want answers, but the mind does what it has to do to protect itself. Miranda will help us, and your speed and hearing are getting better; let your memories find their way back,” she pleaded, reaching for his hand.

Hearing the pain in her voice, whatever she had done to get her own memories back had left their own scar. “If you don’t want to use magic, then I need to know why. Please.”

Aerin hesitated, pushing away her cereal, and he didn’t mean to cost her her appetite.

“My family drowned in a fishing accident in 1944. A Sea Goddess turned me into a siren, maybe out of mercy for the sea taking my family. I already told you this.”

“Did you lose your memory when you were turned into a siren?” he asked, filling in the blanks as she struggled to get the words out. “Did you just wake up one day with a tail?” He chuckled, and it earned him a small smile.

“Long story short, I died. Then, I woke up in the sea, caught up in some fishing net. A traveling witch found and nursed me on her boat. I couldn’t recall who I was; the Sea Goddess gave me something but took something in return: my memories. Desperate, I asked the witch for help, and she gave me a potion to help me access what the sea had taken from me. The pain nearly killed me. The rush of a lifetime of memories, good and bad, nearly stopped my heart.” She rested her hand over her chest, her talons digging into her skin, but she didn’t even wince.

“I don’t have a heart to stop,” he reasoned. She didn’t mention how she died, and he didn’t want to pry into what was clearly the most devastating part of her life.

“With a memory retriever, you’ll wish you had one. I was only in my twenties, and the weight of the memories nearly killed me. You’re hundreds of years old, two of those you spent buried alive. It might not kill you, but instead drive you insane. I realized that the Sea Goddess took my memories not as payment but as part of her gift.”

“But in taking your pain, she also took your identity, the good memories, the love of your family, your life,” Gideon countered.

A tense silence settled between them as he considered her words.

“I can’t stop you if you really want to go down this route,” she said, focusing her attention on her cereal. “But I won’t help you. I didn’t nurse you back to health to watch you go mad.”

Gideon wrestled with his desire for the truth and his reluctance to upset the one person who cared for him. He thought she would be desperate to get rid of him, but instead she was willing to have him stay to keep him safe.

“No witches,” he agreed. “We wait for your friend to see what she finds out.”

“Really?” Aerin stared up at him, a small smile in the crease of her lips.