Page 154

Sarah shook her head with sadness.

‘I will not let our child know what it’s like to go through that.’

‘Oh, Tate.’

His expression tightened into a hard mask of determination. She’d slipped up, offering sympathy; he didn’t want it. Every feature showed a rejection of her softening.

‘Then don’t put our child through that,’ she said, after a beat. ‘We have a choice, just like your parents did. They did the wrong thing; we don’t have to.’

‘Then how do you suggest we proceed?’

She was as clueless now as she had been minutes ago.

‘There is no alternative,’ he answered for her. ‘We both want to raise our child, to be a part of his or her life. This is how it has to be.’

She moved her hand to the fine silver necklace she was wearing, hooking one finger through it and tugging distractedly. His gaze dropped to the gesture and then lingered, and heat flooded her body, awareness clenching between her thighs.

‘We spent three days together in this house,’ she said, slowly. ‘You ignored me almost the whole time.’

‘Almost,’ he repeated, the word droll, his lips shifting into something like a smile. Something that pulled at every part of her, not just her libido. But she ignored it—forcing herself to focus on this conversation, rather than on the way her body was turning into a jellyfish because of how much she wanted him.

‘Is that what our marriage would be like? If—and that’s a massive “if”—I were to agree to this?’

He moved closer, his eyes boring into hers intensely. ‘I ignored you because I was doing my level best not to take advantage of the situation.’

Her lips parted in surprise.

‘I knew that if we spent time together, we’d end up in bed.’

‘Oh.’ Her pulse trembled. ‘So…if, if, we got married, we’d…what would that look like?’ She shook her head, not liking the nature of the question. ‘What would you want it to look like?’ After all, she had a say in this, too.

‘I’m open to negotiation on that score.’

She laughed, even though he’d been deadly serious. ‘I’m sorry. It’s just, you’ve been so…dictatorial. It’s hard to imagine you conceding anything, let alone negotiating.’

His jaw pressed together. ‘I will say this: my father was a masterclass in making women miserable, and I will do everything I can not to turn into him.’

Her heart trembled, her teeth pressing into her lip. ‘What does that mean?’

‘That I will move heaven and earth to make sure you’re not miserable.’

‘Gee, thanks.’ She sucked in a deep breath. ‘I can’t just agree to marry you,’ she said, more to remind herself of the insanity of this plan than to rebuff him.

‘You know it’s inevitable.’

She stared at him, her heart now racing, thumping so hard she wondered how he didn’t hear it.

‘Listen.’ His hand shifted, brushing her thigh slowly, sending goosebumps down her spine, and a rush of need she almost articulated. ‘We can make this work. I know it’s not what either of us would have chosen, but, for our baby, we can do this. As for the details, we’ll work them out as we go along.’

‘You say that like it’s… I don’t know. Like it’s…some unimportant, casual agreement. This is marriage.’ And as soon as she said it, she understood what was holding her back. The secret, long-held hope she’d cherished all her life that she’d find someone one day and fall headlong into love. That was what she wanted in a marriage, not this.

‘And?’

‘And…’ But she couldn’t tell him the truth. Not without exposing more of herself than she wanted to. Not without feeling vulnerable, and something stopped her from showing that side of herself to this man. ‘I need to think about it.’

His eyes locked to hers, and she felt the fight in him. She felt the threats he didn’t say, the arguments he didn’t make. And she knew they were all still there, valid, and pushing her towards the inevitable, just as he’d said. But she needed time to come to terms with this first. ‘Will you take me back to get my car?’

‘I’ll go get it,’ he demurred, standing, and she felt the loss of his proximity and contact like a blade. ‘You stay here. Think. The sooner we do this, the better, so for everyone’s sake, think fast.’