Modern Romance December 2026 Books 1-4
Page 195
‘It’s yours.’ He put it down beside the brown paper bag. ‘Sell it, if you want. I don’t care. But I bought it for you; you should have it.’
She squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting to think about that day. When they’d gone to the hospital, then shopping for bridal gowns, and he’d presented her with the ring almost as though it were an afterthought. But it had meant so much to her, even when she hadn’t formally accepted his proposal.
‘Is that why you’re here?’ she asked softly, disappointment cutting through her.
‘Yes. No.’ He dragged a hand through his hair, so it stuck up in disarray. ‘Sarah…’ His voice died off, as if he’d lost his train of thought. ‘Are you happy?’
She stared at him, wondering if this was some kind of fun for him. ‘Why are you here?’ she asked, rather than answer him.
‘I needed to see you.’
‘To know if I’m happy?’ she probed, shaking her head, because it didn’t make sense. Then again, maybe it did. Tate had told her he didn’t want to be like his dad, that he didn’t want her misery on his conscience, and now he was looking for reassurance. A reassurance she couldn’t give, even when she knew how much it meant to him.
‘To know that you’re okay,’ he said, clearing his throat.
‘I’m…’ But what could she say? She blinked quickly and moved towards the window, staring across the street to where a little boy was flinging a yo-yo at the footpath determinedly as his mother walked at his side. ‘I’m where I need to be, for now.’
‘That’s not an answer.’
She let out a heartbroken laugh, glancing back at Tate. ‘What do you want me to say? This is hard, Tate. Of course it is.’ She swallowed past the lump in her throat. ‘But it’s the only option. I couldn’t stay on the station, knowing how I felt, and how you felt. I wish you hadn’t come here. It’s been hard enough, getting you out of my head, and now I feel like I’m going to be starting from the beginning.’
‘But you’ve managed? To get me out of your head?’
She turned back to the window just as the little boy and his mother rounded the corner.
‘Sarah?’ His tone was sharp, demanding.
She closed her eyes. Honesty was always the best policy, wasn’t it? ‘No.’
Silence fell, except for the rhythm of his breathing, loud and heavy. Urgent, somehow.
‘I don’t think I ever will,’ she admitted, more to herself than him. ‘That’s not how love works. But I guess it will get easier to live with missing you, as life goes on. When I’m busier, perhaps. With the baby, and work…’
She heard him moving then, the rustle of his clothes, when he came to stand at her side. Close enough that she caught a hint of his fragrance in the air.
‘I’m not so sure about that.’
She scrunched up her face. He’d just confirmed her worst fears.
‘With every day that passes, I miss you about a thousand times more than I did the day before,’ he said, and it was so unexpected that she barely processed the words before tilting her face towards him, staring at his eyes, trying to connect the dots of what he was saying. This had to be about the baby, too. He didn’t miss her.
‘I have no reason to think it’s going to get easier. In a year’s time, I’ll probably be mad with how much I need you.’
Or maybe it was about sex? It wasn’t love. He wasn’t here to tell her he wanted her back, that he returned her feelings. It just wasn’t possible. She had to focus, to ignore the way her heart was shouting at her to wrap him in her arms and meld her body against his.
‘I want you to come home with me.’ His voice was guttural, thick with emotion.
Home.
The word landed like a punch in her stomach. She shook her head in a quick rejection of that, because how could she think of the station as ‘home’?
‘I can’t,’ she said, shaking her head. ‘Nothing’s changed, Tate. It will break me to be there with you.’
‘Everything’s changed,’ he contradicted fiercely. ‘That’s what I’m trying to tell you. I miss you. I want you there with me. I hate waking up and finding you gone. You are in my dreams, you are in my mind, you are a part of me, and I need you back. Please.’
There it was again, that plea. The way it was dredged from deep within him, making her think he actually meant this.
‘You want me there because of the baby,’ she said, trying to hold onto her common sense.