Page 66 of Blissful Devotion

I debate pulling away, but instead I let him continue his washing and see where it leads. If he keeps talking or doesn’t, either is fine with me. I just want him here, to be with him.

“Eventually I was taken from the room they had me locked up in and took me to Trigger.”

His hand pauses, and I hear him take a deep breath before he slowly breathes out.

“He took a lot of pleasure in telling me Lorenzo had offered me up to pay his debt.” He shakes his head and continues washing, moving over my chest to my other arm.

“The debt was only a few thousand dollars. Even Trigger was shocked by the offer. But he told me he had a thing for pretty boys, so they negotiated, and I got Lorenzo a few rungs up the ladder and his debt cleared.”

The only sound is the water as it pelts the walls and floor around us as he moves to wash my stomach, dropping to his knees to get my legs.

“Alex…” I swallow past the lump in my throat but can’t stop the way my voice cracks.

With a sigh, he pauses, looking up at me, his eyes full of tears that don’t fall, at least not yet.

“Lorenzo got everything he ever wanted, and all he had to do was hand me over. His only request was to make me ‘less pretty.’” He presses a finger to the scar on his face, and I can’t stop the gasp that’s ripped from me. “He made sure to do that, inside and out.”

This time I can’t stop myself. I bend down, and though it takes me a second and he tries to stop me, I manage to get on my knees before him.

“You’re beautiful, Alex, a wonderful father and an amazing man. Our scars don’t make us who we are. They just prove we were strong enough to survive…” I reach out, cupping his chin in my hand, and run my thumb over his cheek, wiping away the tears that now run down his cheek.

He reaches out, mirroring the way I’m stroking his cheek, and I realize I’m crying too.

Shit.

“I’m not sure what I did to deserve you.” He reaches out, scooping me up into his arms as he sits cross-legged on the floor, the warm spray of water on our side just enough to keep us from getting cold as he holds me close. “For both of you,” he says, resting his hand on my belly. “But I’ll forever be grateful and in awe of you.”

“I…” I try and fail, my words dying in my throat.

“I don’t remember a lot of it. Some of it’s foggy, but I remember waking up alone, tied to a chair in a dark room.” I feel his breath catch, his arms tightening around me as if worried I might disappear, and it gives me the strength to keep going. “At first I was trying to keep him happy while I found a way out. I knew you would come for me. I just had to make it until then, but he saw through me. He gave me my first dose of ‘anti-nausea’ meds when I was asleep, and almost everything after that is cloudy, if there at all.”

“Hey,” he presses a kiss to my head, still holding me. “I’m here. We’ll get through all of this together. You can’t leave us again. We won’t survive it, so whatever you need, we’ll get it.”

I know it’s true, but I’m not sure what that looks like yet, not past this moment where all I need is him like this.

It feels as though he’s holding me together, stopping me from shattering into a million pieces.

“He didn’t…” he trails off, and I look up when I hear his teeth grind together. His face is pinched in anger, and it takes me a second to piece together what he’s asking.

“No, not as far as I can remember, at least.” My hand flies to my throat as I’m reminded of a time he left a bruise around it. “I don’t think so.”

His grip relaxes a little, and we sit like that for a few more seconds before he huffs and breaks our little bubble.

“As much as I’d love to keep you to myself forever, I know a few others who will be over the moon that you remember us.”

His words make my heart race as I think of Desmond, Nathan, Oliver, and Vince.

He helps me stand and once again goes back to pampering me, and I find myself antsy to be done.

“I missed you so much. We all did,” he says as he presses a kiss to my shoulder before he guides me to spin around so that he can wash the soap from my hair.

“I missed you all too, so, so much.” My voice trembles, and I groan in annoyance; I’m so sick of all these emotions.

“Fuck, you know I never really understood my brothers’ kinks. The whole sir, and the idea of getting a woman pregnant, but…” He runs his hands up my stomach, cupping both of my breasts and kneading them as he teases my nipples. “I might see the appeal now, because goddamn Cherry.”

I drop my head back onto his shoulder as my breathing hitches, my nipples beyond sensitive.

“You wanted a big family, though, right? I’m pretty sure we can make that happen, love.”