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‘I don’t know. You’re home for such short periods it’s hard to work you out.’

‘Why are we having this conversation? We made an agreement to give each other independence and freedom. I have not put constraints on where you go, what you do, whom you entertain.’

‘Until now,’ she remarked, unable to hide the sarcasm in her tone.

‘Not even now, to be honest. But given the tension between you both and the fact I don’t trust his intentions, it’s reasonable as your husband to protect you.’ Alex tried hard not to snort her disgust. ‘And you promised me you would extend a similar courtesy of freedom. We were friends before we were anything else, yes? And I’ve been faithful to you in those promises, haven’t I?’

‘You have. The problem is, Matthew, I want independence but I don’t want to be lonely. I want freedom, but I never wished it to feel like I existed on an island without a soulmate. Us getting married was convenient for both of us at the time – please don’t deny that – and yes, we agreed to give each other space to follow our dreams but I don’t remember agreeing to living as a spinster within that marriage.’

‘I don’t follow.’ He frowned but she sensed he was simply buying himself time for his agile mind to work a new charm upon her.

‘All right, let’s make it plainer for you. Sex, Matthew. Would you like to know the last time you shared my bed? I have the date imprinted on my memory because there are so few occasions I can remember each over the past couple of years.’ He opened his mouth to deny her but she pressed her point. He hadn’t seen this conversation coming and he was driving, so he couldn’t just get up and leave the discussion. ‘And even if you don’t care so much about my physical needs, how about emotionally, Matthew? How about simple affection? You might as well kiss the air for the polite way you kiss my cheek. And when we have shared a bed it all felt rather dutiful. You make me feel at times as though you detest me.’

He looked at her now and his features were contorted into annoyance and something else . . . a quality of fear lurked; she had never witnessed this in his expression previously. His exclamation sounded deeply wounded. ‘But I do love you, Alex!’

‘You don’t show it. You love possessing me. You love to call me your wife. But, Matthew, you have no idea about loving me and showing that love through how you speak to me, spend time with me, treat me; forget all the gifts, too. They’re meaningless.’

He made a scoffing sound.

‘No, really. I can buy myself gifts if that was what made my world turn. It doesn’t, though. You know full well that I have never been one for parties or jewels, or keeping up with so and so. I am no socialite. I don’t need that big house to rattle around in alone. I don’t need new pearls or diamonds for parties I am not attending. I don’t want to unwrap presents that are your way of apologising for your absence.’

‘This argument is absurd and unfounded. You told me the single driving force in your world was being able to make chocolates, and as we turn the corner into a new year that’s exactly what we’ve set up for. You shall have your own shop, your own tiny factory and warehouse. I’ve promised to help you with distribution when the time comes. I mean, without my backing your parents would never —’

‘Matthew . . . Matthew . . . stop talking. Stop telling me things I already know. Let’s leave my parents out of this. If I wanted to I could always have had exactly what I wanted. I just didn’t want to achieve my goals at the expense of their happiness. Yes, my mother adores you and couldn’t have selected a more suitable husband if it were left entirely to her choice. But you are presuming too much if you think I was not always in a position to open my shop myself. Understand that you have not made my future possible by marrying me. Please don’t expect me to accept that I should be in a state of wedded bliss simply because you enabled my career. You helped me, yes. You introduced me to the Rowntree family, got me that foot in the door, but everything since then has been because of my endeavours, my hunger for knowledge. I have spent years learning, but without formal training . . . I had to steal my education by hanging around the right people, watching, spending hours and hours long after the factory had closed to learn from people generous enough to share their knowledge. You were not involved in any of this. You were never there anyway! You had already begun gallivanting around the country and leaving me to my own company.’

‘Galliv—!’ He turned to her, his complexion reddening with infuriation. It was the angriest she had seen him. ‘You do understand I work; I’m not playing at the position I hold for —’

‘Indeed. But I also understand this, Matthew. A day or so ago you rang me to say you were about to play a game of chess but it was obvious you were in some sort of bar. I could hear voices, glasses, distant music. No one plays chess to music. I have no issue that you have a social life when away from home – you can’t be expected to live the life of a monk – but I do take issue with your lies. And I know now you have always been lying to me. I’m not sure what it is you are hiding from me. I’ll be honest, I have thought for some time now that you are being unfaithful with other women but curiously I trust your promise. I’ve learned enough about you to know when you are being genuine and your oath just now was persuasive. So if not other women, what is the secret that keeps you from my bed, from our home, from starting a family, from wanting to be around me and our life in York? What is it, Matthew?’

‘And so this is why you keep the company of people like Blakeney?’ he accused, doing his utmost to turn focus back on her behaviour.

‘He is not a reason for our problems. All of our problems are right here in the tiny space of this car. Nothing out there is in our way. The obstacle is between us. We are not getting on.’

‘I thought we were.’ He sounded suddenly contrite, scared even at where this conversation was leading them.

‘No.’ She sighed, for the first time in a long time possessing a sense of clear-headedness. ‘We exist. You’re ever charming and I’m gracious, not wishing to create problems when you do come home, but I’m tired of it. I need more from you.’

‘Henry Blakeney has a lot to answer for.’

‘Leave Harry out of this, Matthew. You’re looking for a target. He’s blameless.’

He blinked at her. ‘You slept with him, didn’t you?’

She held his gaze for an instant and in that moment found the courage she needed. ‘Yes.’

He swerved the car to the side of the road, skidding loudly as the tyres lost traction and slipped onto the soft verge. Curiously, she felt nothing but weightlessness.

‘Only once,’ she continued, ‘but once was enough to open the floodgates on all the emotion that has been banking up behind this controlled façade since we met.’

‘I will kill him,’ Matthew growled, apoplectic.

Alex was surprised by how calm, even detached, she sounded when she spoke. ‘I doubt you could, to be honest. But he’s really not to blame, I assure you. I chose the affair, if you can call a few hours of infidelity that. I chose where and when. I also seduced him. He tried to dissuade me.’

‘Am I supposed to admire his chivalry?’

‘I’m simply stating that he did all he could to avoid my advances.’

‘Not enough, it seems,’ Matthew spat. He glanced to the mirror. ‘I thought you said he’s getting married.’