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“Eyes on me,” Jett repeats.

My ears ring, panic surging through my almost naked body.

It’s happening again— No, not again. This can’t be happening again.

Jett hovers over my body, and my heart jumps in preparation for the dive it’s about to take for the second time.

I tremble as I look up at him. My eyes flick around his face, deciphering which part of him I should memorize.

Which part, that if someone were to ask who did this to me, I could be certain it was him.

“God, your eyes are so fucking beautiful.”

His voice holds no harm, just a soft whisper as he stares into my scared eyes. For a moment, we stay just like this. Him above me, admiring, and me beneath him, fragile and holding my breath.

I don’t respond. I can’t.

Shakily, I nod in response, then the room shifts.

With a bow of his head, Jett looks at me with such tenderness, and steps out of the tense moment we’d just put ourselves in.

His hands begin trailing down my skin in a way that could only be described as loving. No ill intention or pressure behind the tips of his fingers—just pure affection.

“You sure you want to do this?” His voice softens.

Kneeling back on his haunches, his perfectly tattooed body makes him look much rougher than the sensitive words he’s speaking.

Is he really asking me for consent?

Sensation begins to return to my body, and I regain the strength I need to rise onto my elbows, keeping my eyes directly on him.

“W-What?” I can’t help but stutter, my whole body practically shaking.

“This.” He points between us. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. We can go back downstairs for a drink, or we can just kiss. Whatever you want.”

Jett’s touch follows down my leg, to my ankle. Featherlike strokes of his thumb dust short lines on my skin as he waits for my green light.

This is the first hookup since that night that hasn’t felt robotic. Prior to this, I’ve only given myself to someone if I knew I’d be in control. My home, my bed, my rules. I couldn’t get hurt if I performed every interaction the same. I controlled men so I knew they couldn’t ever control me—not like they had before. This, however, is completely out of my hands. From the moment we locked eyes, all of this was so powerful, even I couldn’t stop the rolling thunder.

Looking down at myself, then back to Jett, I realize, everything about this night, about this man, is completely out of my control.

Hiding the mist forming beneath my lashes, I smile at him, my cheeks flushed.

“I want this.”

By the time midafternoon hits, I’m ready to get to Indianapolis. It’s our last stop before we’re back home in Nashville for an entire month.

Relief washes through me, thinking about being back home. Having home field advantage during performances, being able to see my friends after what feels like forever on the road, and best of all, being back at Star Studios.

My mind may be in a different universe right now, but I know I can finish this dance once I’m back where my heart is.

Zipping up the rest of my suitcase, I flop onto the side of the bed, looking hazily out at the foggy Boston skyline.

Our flight doesn’t leave until five, and it’s just after two, so I’ve got some time to kill.

While touring, Taylor has been my assigned roommate. But almost always, she’s anywhere but in the room with me. If I’m not away working on the dance, she’s off with the rest of the dancers, doing God knows what.

I let sadness engulf me as I think of what things between us could’ve been like if I would’ve just told her what happened that night.