Page 30

My head is pounding as I step out of the shower and wrap a towel around me. I can almost smell the stench of spilt beer and cider and feel the coarseness of Tim’s hands as he touched me. Before I know what’s happening, the bile is rising inside me and I bend over the toilet, retching and retching until there’s nothing left to come up.

15

Working on my presentation proves to be just the distraction I need to push the memories of that night back into the dark corner of my brain where they normally live. Waking up in Nathan’s apartment with no memory of the night before was a massive trigger, and there’s something about the whole situation that’s trying to niggle at me, but I can’t afford to let what happened with Tim overwhelm me again. I’m not that Athena.

Instead, I focus on pulling together a presentation that even Jeremiah can’t criticise. I’d visited one of the Fresh Food Mart stores after I’d finished at the office on Friday, and, paired with the information I’ve gleaned from the team, I have plenty of ideas for improvements.

I’m so engrossed in my work that it takes me a moment to notice that someone is knocking tentatively at my door but, when I do, I’m instantly on edge. Realistically, there’s only one person it could be, particularly as it’s Sunday and housekeeping don’t come round at weekends. Am I ready to face Nathan, though? What on earth am I supposed to say? He obviously picked up that something wasn’t right, but one of the ways I keep Tim at bay is not to talk about that night. If I let Nathan in then Tim is going to sneak in with him as the elephant in the room, I just know it. I could pretend not to be here, I suppose, but where else would I be on a Sunday afternoon? Especially as it wouldn’t take Sherlock Holmes to check whether my car was in its space downstairs. I sigh and glance at my watch. It’s three o’clock; I’ve been working solidly for five hours so it would probably be sensible to take a break, and I guess I’m going to have to face Nathan sooner or later. Might as well lance the boil now.

‘Hiya,’ I say as naturally as I can when I open the door. Nathan is holding a packet of biscuits, which he offers to me awkwardly.

‘These are known as Eet Sum Mor,’ he explains. ‘According to the woman in the shop, they’re the best shortbread in South Africa. A peace offering.’

‘You don’t need to make a peace offering,’ I tell him. ‘We haven’t fallen out.’

‘I know we haven’t, but I felt so awful after you left this morning. I really am sorry that I didn’t wake you up last night.’

‘It’s fine, Nathan. Honestly.’

‘It’s not though, is it?’ he says softly, his eyes full of sadness. ‘The way you were this morning? Believe it or not, I’ve seen that look before. You don’t have to talk about it or anything, and I’m not going to pry, but I just couldn’t leave things the way they were. I like to think we’re becoming friends, you and me, and…’ He runs out of steam.

He’s right. We aren’t going to talk about it, but I do value his friendship and I’ve obviously freaked him out. Maybe, if I can show him I’m fine now, we can reset everything to how it was. I step to one side, taking the packet of biscuits off him as I do so.

‘Why don’t you come in?’ I offer. ‘I was working on my presentation, but I probably need to take a break. Tea?’

‘I’d love one,’ he says, following me into the living area. It’s weird, because fewer than twenty-four hours have passed since he was last here, but my reaction to his presence is totally different. It’s like an invisible barrier has gone up between us.

‘Why don’t you open those and take them out onto the balcony?’ I suggest, giving him back the packet of biscuits and a plate. ‘I’ll bring the tea out as soon as it’s ready.’

As soon as he’s slid open the patio doors and stepped outside, it feels like a weight has been lifted off me. This is ridiculous. Come on, Athena. It’s Nathan. He didn’t hurt you. Get a grip. But my mind is stuck firmly in the past and won’t let me drop what happened or stop making comparisons. There are too many similarities to make it easy to let go.

‘Here you go.’ I plaster a smile on my face as I set the mugs down on the little table a few minutes later. Nathan has closed his eyes and is tilting his face up to the sun. I can’t help wondering whether it’s a deliberate act to try to put me at ease, or whether he’s genuinely just soaking up some rays. Beneath us, the afternoon traffic rumbles past, with the occasional blast of a horn providing a kind of backing track to our discomfort.

‘What were you working on?’ he asks, after we’ve both taken an initial bite of our biscuits. Even in my conflicted state, I can tell that they are very good.

‘You don’t know anything about work at weekends, remember?’ I remind him, pleased at how natural I sound.

‘I don’t know anything about my work at weekends,’ he counters with a smile. ‘That doesn’t mean I can’t take an interest in yours.’

‘Fine. What do you know about the way grocery stores are laid out?’

He smiles. ‘Very little. I guess there’s some logic to it, but I couldn’t tell you what it is. My parents are convinced that they move everything around every few months so you can’t find anything and end up buying things you never intended to because you came across them while you were searching. Is that true?’

I can feel myself relaxing as we move deeper into safe and familiar territory. ‘No. I mean, it’s true that they may move things around from time to time, but the aim of that is usually to make the layout match the way the customer shops. In theory, that should make things easier to find, not harder.’

‘Tell that to my parents. Anyway, there is logic to it, that’s the main thing.’

‘Yes, although most people who work in the field would be insulted by the term logic. It’s more of a science.’

‘It’s a supermarket, not astrophysics. Put things on shelves, replace when sold. Where’s the science in that?’

‘Firstly, you’ve got psychology. You need to understand how the customer thinks.’

‘If they’re anything like me, they’re thinking of how they can get round as quickly as possible so they can go and do something else.’

‘That’s actually a really good example. So, how do we help Nathan get round as quickly as possible? We need to lay the store out in a way that makes sense to him, and that starts with product groupings, or display groups.’

‘Display groups.’ He looks dubious.